Kurt Vonnegut Quotes
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Anita had the mechanics of marriage down pat, even to the subtlest conventions. If her approach was disturbingly rational, systematic, she was thorough enough to turn out a credible counterfeit of warmth.
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So let’s give another big tax cut to the super-rich. That’ll teach bin Laden a lesson he won’t soon forget.
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During my three years in Vietnam, I certainly heard plenty of last words by dying American footsoldiers. Not one of them, however, had illusions that he had somehow accomplished something worthwhile in the process of making the Supreme Sacrifice.
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I consider anybody a twerp who hasn't read 'Democracy in America' by Alexis de Tocqueville. There can never be a better book than that one on the strengths and vulnerabilities inherent in our form of government.
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When you're dead you're dead.
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One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.
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We are about to be attacked by Al Qaeda. Wave flags if you have them. That always seems to scare them away. I'm kidding.
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If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind.
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Hi Ho
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The telling of jokes is an art of its own, and it always rises from some emotional threat. The best jokes are dangerous, and dangerous because they are in some way truthful.
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The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest.
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The controls were anything but a hunch-player’s delight in a Universe composed of one-trillionth part matter to one decillion parts black velvet futility.
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Fish! Fish! Fish!
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Humor is an almost physiological response to fear.
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All writers are going to have to learn more about science, because it's such an interesting part of their environment.
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I asked Rob Roy where he had gone to college.'Yale,' he said.I told him what Helen Dole said about Yale, that it ought to be called 'Plantation Owners' Tech.''I don't get it,' he said.'I had to ask her to explain it myself,' I said. 'She said Yale was where plantation owners learned how to get the natives to kill each other instead of them.'
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Make love when you can. It's good for you.
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And a step backward, after making a wrong turn, is a step in the right direction.
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'I liked him very much,' said Constant.'The insane, on occasion, are not without their charms,' said Beatrice.
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This country is being managed to death, being public related to death.
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All the things you are are going to be sued and sued successfully. And, while the litigants may not be able to get blood from turnips, they can certainly ruin the turnips in the process of trying.
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The highest treason in the USA is to say Americans are not loved, no matter where they are, no matter what they are doing there.
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I've got news for Mr. Santayana: we're doomed to repeat the past no matter what. That's what it is to be alive.
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My theory is that all women have hydrofluoric acid bottled up inside.