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When you become famous, being famous becomes your profession.
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Campaigns are about adjustments.
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Ideologies aren't all that important. What's important is psychology.
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Every day Catholics prove that you can be a good Catholic and a good Democrat and have a different position from the Church on abortion.
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There are many Republicans who hardly even know a Democrat. And there are just as many, if not more, Democrats who don't know a Republican.
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My favorite Saturday, outside any Saturday that Louisiana State University plays football, is the Kentucky Derby.
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When you dehumanize a group, there's lasting consequences because they know that they're being dehumanized.
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Who cares? Sometimes you need rebirth. (On the destruction of America)
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Washington is a dirty diaper. It's time for a change.
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With the all-volunteer military, we, as a society, have become disconnected from our armed forces. And our military, like almost everything else in our country, has been outsourced.
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John McCain, if you liked the last eight, you are going to love the next four.
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As with mosquitoes, horseflies, and most bloodsucking parasites, Kenneth Starr was spawned in stagnant water.
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Hurricane Katrina hit the Gulf Coast and destroyed much of the Gulf Coast - that was an act of God … Now what happened to New Orleans, that was a complete failure of the federal government. Complete negligence by the feds.
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Republicans want smaller government for the same reason crooks want fewer cops: it's easier to get away with murder.
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I have always loved the college atmosphere - sometimes too much, which is why I spent so long at LSU.
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Democrats cluster in cities, and Republicans don't.
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Let me buy a security pass … so that they can scan me and and search me and measure my penis, then let me get on the plane.
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You can call the dogs in, wet the fire, and leave the house. The hunt's over.
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Back when I went to Louisiana State University a million years ago, we got the Baton Rouge paper. But if you wanted to read 'The New York Times' or 'The Wall Street Journal,' you had to go to the reading room of the student union, and you got the edition several days after it had been published, and you had to read it on a wooden stick.
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If you didn't have some sense of idealism, then what is there to sustain you?
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But I'd rather not predict. I'd rather affect.
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Back in 2000 a Republican friend warned me that if I voted for Al Gore and he won, the stock market would tank, we'd lose millions of jobs, and our military would be totally overstretched. You know what? I did vote for Al Gore, he did win, and I'll be damned if all those things didn't come true!
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When I was wrong about the 2002 elections, I dumped a garbage can on my head. When my John Kerry prediction didn't pan out in 2004, I smashed an egg on my face.
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I didn’t just experiment with marijuana - if you know what I mean.