John Oliver Quotes
I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.

Quotes to Explore
-
I said we're going to leave phones, and so we did. We sold it to Sony.
-
I have to say, sushi freaks me out more than almost anything.
-
I have a very small public.
-
Commit yourself to a mighty purpose.
-
Republicans in Congress boosted the economy by cutting taxes and ending programs that don't work.
-
I'm not trying to be the next Dave Grohl or Phil Collins.
-
You can pretend to be serious; but you can't pretend to be witty.
-
If there's a problem, we at Wine Library never tell ourselves that once we handle this issue, we'll never have to deal with the person again. We talk to every single person as though we're going to wind up sitting next to that person at his or her mother's house that night for dinner.
-
People don't want to hear about it if you're frustrated with your big career break.
-
When you have a few billion people connected with screens, not voice... screens are important. You can transmit a thousand times more information.
-
With high underemployment - currently over one million part-time workers in the UK want to work more hours - sanctioning clients who cannot increase their hours seems to be both unworkable and unfair.
-
Storytellers have the right to answer any question they choose.
-
Our Heavenly Father continues to communicate with us through revelation. These revelations are communications of divine directions. They may come to us personally or through the voice of the Lord's chosen servants, the prophets, seers, and revelators.
-
As an adult and a parent, when I'm not acting, I'm not acting. I'm being a parent, and I'm on the school run, and I'm sewing labels onto socks. That's what I'm doing.
-
I sort of believe that my voice was preordained; I'm a Buddhist who believes in reincarnation so I think that my voice is a few lifetimes old.
-
This modeling thing, it's pretty easy, but actually it's also really tough.
-
When one loves one's Art no service seems too hard.
-
If I have a day off, I'll get up at three in the afternoon and make some noodles. I fix my makeup and then party until 5 A.M.
-
There have been actresses who transitioned and nobody knew. But for me, with everybody knowing my history, it will be harder. I'm sure there are some great scripts calling for an ultra-glamorous woman. And I'm prepared to be ultra-glamorous.
-
Was it possible I'd labeled him incorrectly? Shallow jocksdidn't overcome adversity and accomplish the things Leif had. I'd labeled him, not even knowing him. Just because girls went gaga over him andevery boy wanted to be him didn't make him a jerk. The only jerk in the room happened to be the judgmental, elitist female. Me.
-
Simultaneously, my two biggest heroes are Susan Sontag and Morticia Addams from 'The Addams Family.'
-
The last thing you want is an injured actor. That, or having to use a stuntman too much.
-
I don't live my life on the road. I'm getting on a bit and there's a lot of other things in my life. Our lovely children and their lives. It's more of a part-time business these days.
-
I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.