Erma Bombeck Quotes
Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.

Quotes to Explore
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The position is: the Gaelic language is no longer the native language; it is dead, yet food is being brought to the graveyard.
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In my experience, great reviews almost always ensure no sales.
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You can't, no matter what anyone says, build a movie around someone.
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Ethel Merman would stay with a show for years and tour with it. So would Mary Martin, the great stars. They recognized the value of that success and nurtured it. Now, you come from Hollywood, you play 12 weeks and go away. I don't think that's the best policy.
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I'm a character actor, but I look like a leading man.
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It's harder, but we're still finding oil in Oklahoma today. The bar has been raised on startup companies, but it can still be done. Every regulation and every rule limits you, but, yes, it can still be done. That's the beauty of living in a free country and having the freedom to have an idea and become an entrepreneur.
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First and foremost, you've got to make yourself happy. Essentially being who you are is the most important thing. When you're after truth, happiness always comes.
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I force myself to outline, but not too closely, so I guess I plot by the seat of my pants? My natural instinct is to dive right in, but I know I'll get stuck. I like to stick with the architect vs. gardener metaphor. I guess I'm a gardener who plants tomatoes. I have the sticks in the ground and let the vines grow along those parameters.
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I have a very good family. I'm very fortunate to have a very good family. I believe very strongly in the family. It's one of the things we have in our platform, is to talk about it.
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I was one of the only ones there interested in acting. You find when you're doing school plays that a lot of people there were on punishment, or something.
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I think I am the same kind of person I would have been if I wasn't an actor. I am not a robot.
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Sex and drugs and rock and roll.
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… the ego's need to be periodically in conflict with something or someone in order to strengthen its sense of separation between me and the other, without which it cannot survive.
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I can never look now at the Milky Way without wondering from which of those banked clouds of stars the emissaries are coming. If you will pardon so commonplace a simile, we have set off the fire alarm and have nothing to do but to wait. I do not think we will have to wait for long
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I've never gotten cash out of a machine. I use my credit cards, so I don't need to do that.
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As female artists, we have to be constantly criticized for the way that we look, the way that we dress, on a whole other level that men don't have to face.
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I knew I couldn't solve it. Because I couldn't figure out what made her drink when things were going well.
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Every American, whether Democrat or Republican, agrees that job creation and affordable energy will be crucial to our economic turnaround.
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Russia can be quite a dangerous place sometimes, but I never think about it.
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I represent celebrities, but I am not a celebrity.
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It's terrible when I go somewhere, and I'm not recognized.
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My background is in tech. I studied computer science, and was working on TechTV, so the first thing I wanted to do was see my favorite motherboard stories hit the front page; you know, like, really geeky stuff.
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You know in America the general consensus is that rock is dead. Ever since the alternative thing came in. With rock, it's like they just don't want to know about it.
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Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.