Tommy Cooper Quotes
Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'

Quotes to Explore
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I once said, 'Steve Jobs is the American Xavier Niel,' but that was humour.
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A kiss, when all is said, what is it? A rosy dot placed on the 'I' in loving; Tis a secret told to the mouth instead of to the ear.
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One minute, it seemed I had more movie offers than I could handle; the next – no one wanted me.
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When I said I was going to audition for a film, I got a hearty laugh from all my family.
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A Central Bank official said that Q-coin did not affect the renminbi; it adds vibrancy to the economy.
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I don't know any member of Congress who ever said, 'I'm satisfied with the communication that we have from the White House.'
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I have a tweet that said, 'I want to be a Calvin Klein model,' and that was in 2011. And then I modeled for Calvin Klein. And then I had a tweet like, 'I wonder what it's like to be in front of thousands of fans,' and I've been in front of thousands of fans.
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People said I couldn't gig, and I proved them wrong.
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Who would think it possible to redirect historical scholarship by explaining what Thomas Jefferson said in the Declaration of Independence?
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Franklin Roosevelt said the test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance to those who have much; it is whether we provide enough to those who have too little. This reconciliation package fails that test as well.
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The real being of language is that into which we are taken up when we hear it - what is said.
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They've got this house style which is writer driven. I heard of one person who sent his script in, and Karen Berger said there weren't enough words in it. Put some more in.
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When I've been asked what should be on my gravestone, I've said: 'Here lies Gandalf. He came out.' Two big achievements.
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The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.
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She said it had been hijacked shortly after takeoff. By this time, the plane had been in the air - again, I'm presuming that it took off on time - for over an hour.
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I have never said that there is no need for a guru. All depends on what you call guru. He need not be in a human form.
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I've always said I'm the worst representative of Muslim-Americans that's ever existed, because I've been inside more bars than mosques.
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It is often said that men are ruled by their imaginations; but it would be truer to say they are governed by the weakness of their imaginations.
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The bulls are my best friends." I translated to Brett. "You kill your friends?" she asked. "Always," he said in English, and laughed. "So they don't kill me.
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Morgan sighed. "I," she announced, "am so pathetic." "You are not," I said. "I am." She went over and straightened the cling wrap, corner to corner. "Do you know how many times I've brought in devilled eggs? This is, like, the only time I haven't been sobbing and that's only 'cause I cried all night. And Norman," she said, her voice rising to a wail, "sweet Norman, always just acts so surprised to see the eggs, and pleased, and he never, once, has ever acted like he knew what they meant."
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As the mind shrinks at the will of the initiate, thought flows in to fill the spaces so created.
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I had a migraine for about seven or eight straight days, and I was unable to sleep most nights.
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People are beginning to understand there is nothing in the world so remote that it can't impact you as a person. It's not just diseases. Economists are now beginning to say if we are going to have good markets in Africa, we're going to have to have healthy people in Africa.
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Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'