President Bush Quotes
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President Bush said he didn't want to renew the Assault Weapons Ban because it might 'infringe on hunters' rights'. Who needs an AK-47 machine gun to go hunting? Let me tell you guys something... If it takes you 500 rounds to bring down a deer, I don't want you going to the bathroom in MY house!
Elayne Boosler
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The corporate scandals are getting bigger and bigger. In a speech on Wall Street, President Bush spoke out on corporate responsibility, and he warned executives not to cook the books. Afterwards, Martha Stewart said the correct term was to saute the books.
Conan O'Brien
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President Bush on Monday defended U.S. interrogation of terrorists, saying 'We do not torture.' He added, 'We freedom electrocute.'
Amy Poehler
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The joke was that President Bush only declared war when Starbucks was hit. You can mess with the U.N. all you want, but when you start interfering with the right to get caffeinated, someone has to pay.
Chris Kyle
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The failure to prosecute trivializes the acts constituting the crime, suggesting, in the case of President Bush, that torture, disappearance, cruel and inhuman treatment, abrogation of our treaties, violation of our laws on privacy, deception of the Congress, and subversion of the constitutional checks on war making are minor matters, easily overlooked. It means rejecting what used to be regarded as core American values, and even worse, sends a clear signal to future presidents that they may act with similar disregard for the law.
Elizabeth Holtzman
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This will be a defining moment -- President Bush has to pick between what mainstream America wants and what the radical right demands. He can make good on his promises to unite the country by reaching out across party lines to find a consensus nominee who'll respect privacy rights, value women's freedom and defend constitutional traditions.
Nancy Keenan
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During last night's debate, John Kerry and John Edwards were so friendly to each other some political experts think that they may end up running together. In fact Kerry and Edwards were so friendly, President Bush accused them of planning a gay marriage.
Conan O'Brien
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At the unveiling at the White House of the presidential portrait, President Bush pointed out that Hillary Clinton was the first sitting Senator in history to have her portrait hanging in the White House.
Eleanor Clift
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Officials at the White House are saying that President Bush hasn't changed his schedule much since the war started. The main difference, they say, is that he's started watching the news and taping Sponge Bob.
Conan O'Brien
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Earlier today, President Bush said Kerry will be a tough and hard-charging opponent. That explains why Bush's nickname for Kerry is math.
Conan O'Brien
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Hillary's opponent, in his entire campaign, every two or three weeks has said for months and months and months, beginning in Nevada, that really there wasn't much difference in how America did when I was president and how America's done under President Bush. Now, if you believe that, you should probably vote for him, but you get a very bad grade in history.
Bill Clinton
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I know a lot of you believe that most people in the news business are liberal. Let me tell you, I know a lot of them, and they were almost evenly divided this time. Half of them liked Senator Kerry; the other half hated President Bush.
Andy Rooney