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In my ideal world, my next novel would have a first printing of, say, 2,500 hardcovers for reviewers, libraries, collectors, and autograph hounds. The publisher could print more copies if they get low. And simultaneously, or six weeks later, the book would be available in paperback.
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For years I'd understood that publishing in paperback was the kiss of death.
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Most people are remarkably resilient. Even those who have been through war or great loss often find reservoirs of strength. But the legacy of trauma is a heavy burden to bear.
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Many people, for many reasons, feel rootless - but orphans and abandoned or abused children have particular cause.
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I think fondly of the rabbit holes I disappeared down when I researched papers for history and English because I couldn't find quite what I was looking for, or because I had to go through so much material to find examples for my thesis.
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My mother was one of the most dynamic and brilliant women I have ever known. She was also mercurial and unfocused.
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I think a lot of readers are looking for a book they can talk about.
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Part of the reason I wanted to write a novel was that in fiction I could do something that's difficult to do in real life, which is to dwell on the stark details of the experience without really needing to create that narrative of redemption.