Chris D'Elia Quotes

I never really feel like just standing there and telling jokes. I want to move around. In fact, it's hard for me to write a joke where I don't end up on the ground for some reason. Hey, at least that way, I know no comics will steal my jokes. Too many bruises.

Chris D'Elia

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Quotes to Explore

• My father was a very gregarious, very open guy. So every weekend, the house was full of people.

  

  J. B. Pritzker
  • People
  • Father
  • Guy

• I love to walk into Borders or Barnes & Noble and see my books there. It's fabulous.

  

  P. C. Cast
  • See
  • Books
  • Fabulous

• My mother is the sort of a person who has no boundaries and no filter. She also has a big ego, but it's a very unique one. And I grew up with lots of artists in an environment where conformity and the norm were totally not what anybody was after.

  

  Gaby Hoffmann
  • Mother
  • Environment
  • Unique

• In my opinion, all relationships between people have some sort of violence, and it is central.

  

  Park Chan-wook
  • People
  • Opinion
  • Violence

• In this era in which we live, the old-fashioned virtues grow increasingly unpopular.

  

  B. Carroll Reece
  • Live
  • Grow
  • Old-fashioned

• You can't expect to make no effort. You still have to make the effort and be kind and understanding.

  

  Zooey Deschanel
  • You
  • Understanding
  • Effort

• I was a dancer when I got discovered, and I started working immediately. I started being in commercials and doing guest star roles. My first big thing, which happened maybe six months after being discovered, was 'Bring It On: All or Nothing.'

  

  Francia Raisa
  • Star
  • Doing
  • Working

• Hungary is, in a word, in a state of WAR against the Hapsburg dynasty, a war of legitimate defence, by which alone it can ever regain independence and freedom.

  

  Lajos Kossuth
  • War
  • Freedom
  • Alone

• In sleep, you are safe from the revolting mechanics of living and being a prey to outrageous fortune.

  

  Taylor Caldwell
  • You
  • Sleep
  • Fortune

• Evolution - evolutionary change - does not happen quickly.

  

  Jack Horner
  • Change
  • Evolution
  • Happen

• In a sense there is no 'opposition' in Bahrain, as the phrase implies one unified block with the same views. Such a phrase is not in our constitution, unlike say the United Kingdom. We only have people with different views and that's ok.

  

  Hamad bin Isa Al Khalifa
  • People
  • Different
  • Same

• We got to think of other ways to help these kids out because there's a lot of kids who get hurt in college and then don't make it to the NFL and don't have insurance, and their entire lives are changed when they put their bodies on the line for their school.

  

  Aaron Rodgers
  • School
  • Kids
  • Help

• All I ever wanted to do was play competitive golf against the best players in the world.

  

  Jack Nicklaus
  • World
  • Best
  • Golf

• War is not an exercise of the will directed at an inanimate matter.

  

  Carl von Clausewitz
  • War
  • Exercise
  • Matter

• It is no surprise that companies do not often respond to moral pressure alone. We need to hit them hard in their pocketbook and on their balance sheet. We need to show them that their stock prices will be affected if their actions encourage Iran's nuclear weapons ambitions.

  

  Ted Deutch
  • Alone
  • Moral
  • Balance

• I had a peace all day. I knew it was a tough golf course. I probably prayed more the last three holes than I ever did in my life.

  

  Webb Simpson
  • Life
  • Peace
  • Day

• I'm not very bright about money. I'm not domestic either. If I don't learn how to cook, maybe I won't have to.

  

  Natalie Wood
  • Money
  • Learn
  • Cook

• The Americans are more honest about it and just call it college rock.

  

  Malcolm Wilson
  • College
  • Rock
  • Honest

• I would be ecstatic if the very first writer to step foot in a Storyknife cabin was an Alaska Native woman writer.

  

  Dana Stabenow
  • Woman
  • First
  • Step

• You can't forge a new sort of consensus, you can't forge public opinion, by following public opinion.

  

  Martin O'Malley
  • Opinion

• I like to work in the morning, usually from 7-12, and still always hope to do more later. At the end of a book, I just work most of the time, but in general, I like to be working nice and early.

  

  Markus Zusak
  • Time
  • Work
  • Book

• 250,000 people turned up in Dublin to cheer me on an open-topped bus along O'Connell St after my world title winning fight in 1985. I'll never forget the sea of smiling faces that greeted me that day.

  

  Barry McGuigan
  • People
  • Up
  • World

• I love fashion, and that's how I express myself.

  

  Victoria Beckham Spice Girls
  • Love
  • Fashion
  • Express Myself

• I never really feel like just standing there and telling jokes. I want to move around. In fact, it's hard for me to write a joke where I don't end up on the ground for some reason. Hey, at least that way, I know no comics will steal my jokes. Too many bruises.

  

  Chris D'Elia
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