Dave Barry Quotes

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

Dave Barry

• Strong
• Patriotic

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Quotes to Explore

• By the end of 2008, clearly the Al Qaeda and Sunni insurgency had been relatively stabilized. And in the Al Qaeda's mind, they were defeated.

  

  Jack Keane
  • Mind
  • End
  • Defeated

• One can quite understand vegetarianism. One can quite understand meat-eating. But it is difficult to understand why a person who is a flesh-eater should object to one kind of flesh, namely cow's flesh. This is an anomaly which call for explanation.

  

  Babasaheb
  • Why
  • Understand
  • Difficult

• Your man wants to know that there's nothing you wouldn't do for him - if that's your committed relationship.

  

  Karrine Steffans
  • Man
  • Know
  • Relationship

• In the last four years, I heard the same thing over and over again from people: 'We've had enough,' 'Our country is drifting,' 'We've lost our way.'

  

  Ted Yoho
  • People
  • Country
  • Lost

• I like to take walks in the park by myself, where no one can bother me and I can think.

  

  Magic Johnson
  • Think
  • Me
  • Bother

• Fashion's important to me, but beauty fades. All that stuff is fun while it lasts, but anything can happen tomorrow. You've got to have so much more about you than the way you look or your clothes.

  

  FKA twigs
  • Important
  • Fun
  • Fashion

• I consider myself a writer who happens to write about history, rather than a historian. I was an English major in college. What I've learned about history is in the field, so to speak. Going into the archives and working with it directly.

  

  Nathaniel Philbrick
  • History
  • College
  • Myself

• I've made a decision and now I must face the consequences.

  

  J. Michael Straczynski
  • Decision
  • Face
  • Consequences

• I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.

  

  Ilie Nastase
  • Wife
  • Police
  • Missing

• I like a guy who uses his hips when he's dancing.

  

  Tara Reid
  • Guy
  • Like
  • Dancing

• Court TV will always hold a special place in my heart, and I will always look back at my time there with great gratitude and affection.

  

  Nancy Grace
  • Time
  • Great
  • Heart

• The biggest misconception about me is the bad-boy image that everyone stuck me into due to my tattoos, drug days and the constant changes I make with my hair color.

  

  AJ McLean
  • Bad
  • Hair
  • Boy

• I remember when I was in third grade, I was in a classroom, and the teacher said, 'What do you want to do when you get older?' We were going around the room. I said, 'I want to be a professional basketball player.' She's like, 'That's not realistic.' I thought to myself, 'OK, watch.'

  

  Zach LaVine
  • She
  • Remember
  • Myself

• I was addicted to the original 'Star Trek' when I was growing up, because of my dad. We grew up in St. Helens, Oregon and we weren't allowed to watch a lot of TV.

  

  Katee Sackhoff
  • Up
  • Growing
  • Dad

• We did a lot of those road trips, all the mandatory stuff that you should when you're a kid, like Mount Rushmore and the Grand Canyon and the Sequoias and the western coast.

  

  Vicki Lawrence
  • You
  • Road
  • Grand Canyon

• Especially on unexpected journeys, you have time; you can figure certain deeper things out, like who you are and what you want. That's why I enjoy journeys.

  

  Imtiaz Ali
  • Time
  • Why
  • Enjoy

• When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.

  

  Wayne Dyer
  • You
  • Yourself
  • Judge

• It's hard to say this about a guy like Eddie Van Halen, one of the greatest guitar players who ever lived, but he's really limited to a style and they're locked into it.

  

  Sammy Hagar Chickenfoot
  • Guy
  • Style
  • Guitar

• Wine, like food, is so emotional. If you think about it, so much of the courting ritual is surrounded by wine and food. There's a built-in romance to wine.

  

  Padma Lakshmi
  • Food
  • Emotional
  • Wine

• I want you. All of you. Your flaws. Your mistakes. Your imperfections. I want you, and only you.

  

  John Roger Stephens
  • Mistakes
  • Flaws
  • I Want

• You know, with the film industry crews, there's an odd mix between a very technical and a very artistic approach to the work, and sometimes as a woman you have to be a little bit careful about how things come out because people don't really want to listen if it's in a certain emotional tone or too strong.

  

  Kristen Stewart
  • People
  • Work
  • Strong

• I write about myself with the same pencil and in the same exercise book as about him. It is no longer I, but another whose life is just beginning.

  

  Samuel Beckett
  • Life
  • Book
  • Myself

• Most of us start from that position of irony now and what I wanted to do - really felt like I had to do if I was going to write another novel - was move towards something like sincerity.

  

  Ben Lerner
  • Novel
  • Sincerity
  • Irony

• We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

  

  Dave Barry
  • Strong
  • Patriotic