Dave Barry Quotes

We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

Dave Barry

• Strong
• Patriotic

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Quotes to Explore

• By the end of 2008, clearly the Al Qaeda and Sunni insurgency had been relatively stabilized. And in the Al Qaeda's mind, they were defeated.

  

  Jack Keane
  • Mind
  • End
  • Defeated

• One can quite understand vegetarianism. One can quite understand meat-eating. But it is difficult to understand why a person who is a flesh-eater should object to one kind of flesh, namely cow's flesh. This is an anomaly which call for explanation.

  

  Babasaheb
  • Why
  • Understand
  • Difficult

• Your man wants to know that there's nothing you wouldn't do for him - if that's your committed relationship.

  

  Karrine Steffans
  • Man
  • Know
  • Relationship

• In the last four years, I heard the same thing over and over again from people: 'We've had enough,' 'Our country is drifting,' 'We've lost our way.'

  

  Ted Yoho
  • People
  • Country
  • Lost

• I like to take walks in the park by myself, where no one can bother me and I can think.

  

  Magic Johnson
  • Think
  • Me
  • Bother

• Fashion's important to me, but beauty fades. All that stuff is fun while it lasts, but anything can happen tomorrow. You've got to have so much more about you than the way you look or your clothes.

  

  FKA twigs
  • Important
  • Fun
  • Fashion

• I consider myself a writer who happens to write about history, rather than a historian. I was an English major in college. What I've learned about history is in the field, so to speak. Going into the archives and working with it directly.

  

  Nathaniel Philbrick
  • History
  • College
  • Myself

• I've made a decision and now I must face the consequences.

  

  J. Michael Straczynski
  • Decision
  • Face
  • Consequences

• I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.

  

  Ilie Nastase
  • Wife
  • Police
  • Missing

• I like a guy who uses his hips when he's dancing.

  

  Tara Reid
  • Guy
  • Like
  • Dancing

• Court TV will always hold a special place in my heart, and I will always look back at my time there with great gratitude and affection.

  

  Nancy Grace
  • Time
  • Great
  • Heart

• The biggest misconception about me is the bad-boy image that everyone stuck me into due to my tattoos, drug days and the constant changes I make with my hair color.

  

  AJ McLean
  • Bad
  • Hair
  • Boy

• I remember when I was in third grade, I was in a classroom, and the teacher said, 'What do you want to do when you get older?' We were going around the room. I said, 'I want to be a professional basketball player.' She's like, 'That's not realistic.' I thought to myself, 'OK, watch.'

  

  Zach LaVine
  • She
  • Remember
  • Myself

• I was addicted to the original 'Star Trek' when I was growing up, because of my dad. We grew up in St. Helens, Oregon and we weren't allowed to watch a lot of TV.

  

  Katee Sackhoff
  • Up
  • Growing
  • Dad

• We did a lot of those road trips, all the mandatory stuff that you should when you're a kid, like Mount Rushmore and the Grand Canyon and the Sequoias and the western coast.

  

  Vicki Lawrence
  • You
  • Road
  • Grand Canyon

• Especially on unexpected journeys, you have time; you can figure certain deeper things out, like who you are and what you want. That's why I enjoy journeys.

  

  Imtiaz Ali
  • Time
  • Why
  • Enjoy

• When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.

  

  Wayne Dyer
  • You
  • Yourself
  • Judge

• It's hard to say this about a guy like Eddie Van Halen, one of the greatest guitar players who ever lived, but he's really limited to a style and they're locked into it.

  

  Sammy Hagar Chickenfoot
  • Guy
  • Style
  • Guitar

• If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife.

  

  Ann Landers
  • Wife

• I don't think you're very strong unless you've cried a few tears. You've never really lived.

  

  Brady Jandreau
  • Strong
  • Tears

• What is character? It is that quality of man which is going to make a man, in an hour of strain, do the just and, if possible, the generous thing.

  

  Douglas Southall Freeman
  • Character
  • Quality

• All too often, academic departments defend their territory with the passion of cornered animals, though with far less justification.

  

  Bruce Jackson
  • Passion

• Sarajevo was this beautiful city, very cosmopolitan, multiethnic, full of wonderful people, artists and writers and poets and Serbs and Muslims and Croats, and living side by side. And then this medieval siege, and it was a medieval siege, came, and the Bosnian Serbs were on the hills lobbing in rockets and grenades and mortars.

  

  Janine di Giovanni
  • People
  • Beautiful
  • City

• We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail.

  

  Dave Barry
  • Strong
  • Patriotic