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I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.
Bob Hope -
I know I'm in England because this morning, my stomach got up two hours before I did and had a cup of tea! I've had so much tea, I slosh when I walk! You have to drink tea - I've tasted the coffee!
Bob Hope
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I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money.
Bob Hope -
The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.
Bob Hope -
The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup.
Bob Hope -
I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there.
Bob Hope -
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
Bob Hope -
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
Bob Hope
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If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf.
Bob Hope -
Thanks to our brave allies: you gallant Russian bear, you British everywhere.
Bob Hope -
She said she was approaching forty, and I couldn't help wondering from what direction.
Bob Hope -
If I have to lay an egg for my country, I'll do it.
Bob Hope -
I have too much money invested in sweaters.
Bob Hope -
A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live.
Bob Hope
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I like to play in the low 70's. If it gets any hotter than that I'll stay in the bar!
Bob Hope -
I have a wonderful make-up crew. They're the same people restoring the Statue of Liberty.
Bob Hope -
Bigamy is the only crime where two rites make a wrong.
Bob Hope -
You never get tired unless you stop and take time for it.
Bob Hope -
I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.
Bob Hope -
If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of heart trouble.
Bob Hope
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People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.
Bob Hope -
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.
Bob Hope -
When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.
Bob Hope -
When we recall the past, we usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness.
Bob Hope