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Yes, I made mistakes by rebelling, by acting out in confused ways.
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I'm happy with what I've done but it's a challenge to try to win more.
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It doesn't matter whether I qualify or wildcards.
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I do still have some of the experience from playing, but it's been so long since I've been out in those quarters, semis, finals, the important final matches, just against the top players.
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I mean, I feel like just a new person completely.
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It wasn't my tennis that made me lose, it was a lot of different things going on, high drama, high emotion.
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People want to hear what I have to say and respect what I say.
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I just want to get to the level where I can say that that's my level, just try to play well, get up there.
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I mean, obviously, a lot of people know me around the world. Kids know me.
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Coming back after the layoff, I wasn't really sure what to expect.
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But, you know, I just want to play well and have fun playing well.
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Let me say that the path I did take for a brief period of my life was not of reckless drug use, hurting others, but it was a path of quiet rebellion, of a little experimentation of a darker side of my confusion in a confusing world, lost in the midst of finding my identity.
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This is the hardest thing I've ever done. The rehab has not gone as expected.
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To win Grand Slams you have to be in the right frame of mind, the right physical shape.
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I know there is much mystery, much question to what happened, and I must also say, many lies.
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You know, I'm confident before I go out and play a match that I know, you know, I've put in the work and like I feel confident that I am going to go out there and play well.
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I feel like I've started a new chapter in my life, and I need to leave the past behind.
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Tennis is what I do and is part of who I am.
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I was an emotional basket case.
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Now a lot has changed and I can separate a lot of things.