Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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This is who I am: a flyspeck of human vanity in a trillion miles of stone-dead interstellar space; a graceless lump of flesh and fear in a remote desert where nearly everything that I can see or touch is designed to hurt me.
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If you're a thinking person, the liver is interesting, but nothing is more intriguing than the brain.
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A strong, successful man is not the victim of his environment. He creates favorable conditions. His own inherent force and energy compel things to turn out as he desires.
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The Schindler Jews were off-limits in Brunnlitz.
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I've been very fortunate in my collaborators throughout my career.
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I thoroughly enjoy working with kids, whether it's The First Tee or the lesson tee with my grandkids.
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The difficult part was to tell the world that I was finishing.
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My quality of life here in Quebec City is extraordinary.
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Athletes don't like to get up early, but it never bothered me.
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The soul is placed in the body like a rough diamond, and must be polished, or the luster of it will never appear.
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During my twenties and thirties, my interest in the political poem increased as my apparent access to it declined. I sensed resistances around me. I was married; I lived in a suburb; I had small children.
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I always believe the rule by king or official leader is outdated. Now we must catch up with the modern world.
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When I say artist I mean the man who is building things - creating molding the earth - whether it be the plains of the west - or the iron ore of Penn. It's all a big game of construction - some with a brush - some with a shovel - some choose a pen.
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Once I dive in, I dive in all the way.
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Each generation must recreate liberty for its own times.
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Show me someone who never gossips, and I will show you someone who is not interested in people.
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I think hip hop is a dance music that's rebellious by nature.
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I wanted to build a tool for my generation: people 20 to 40 who don't want to spend time balancing a checkbook or checking multiple financial institutions' websites. Mint does just that, giving comprehensive, quick insights into a user's finances from their computer, mobile phone and/or tablet.
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I think that because I have so many different influences, and that shows in my music, that different people can connect with it.
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I think that we're so generous in some of our social problems that people are unwilling to get a job outside in the heat. Rather than get 15 dollars to go get roofing, they'd rather get 9 or 10 dollars in benefits.
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People who are running for office mislead the American people by saying that there's a three-point plan or a bumper sticker kind of way of bringing down gasoline prices. The fact of the matter is that nobody can do that. The price of oil is set on the global economy. People who have looked at this closely and hard know that's the case.
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Those who are right do not argue. Those who argue are not right.
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I'm such a proponent of the theatrical experience and the cinematic experience, and we've reached this point where the magicians are not only giving away their tricks, but they're telling us how they're doing the tricks in advance before you even come to the magic show. It'd be nice to get a little of the mystery back in.
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I'm a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent.
