Jim Gaffigan Quotes
As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'
Quotes to Explore
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I was involved with drama departments since the 5th grade. I played at it. It was an escape.
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It would be hard to ignore the absence of democracy in any Arab nation.
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I listen to 'deep dish house'.
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Here or henceforward it is all the same to me, I accept Time absolutely.
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The nature of good fiction is that it dwells in ambiguity.
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You know something, if you're not acting, you're not an actor - you've gotta work. No way around it.
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All achievements, all earned riches, have their beginning in an idea.
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Always just remember that you can never know all; you're always going to be learning; there's always going to be something new. I don't think you'll ever have it all figured out.
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I've always had this sneaking suspicion that I get a kick out of the insecurity.
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You have to train people how to be business innovators. If you don't train them, the quality of the ideas that you get in an innovation marketplace is not likely to be high.
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Take heed, then, often to come together to give thanks to God, and show forth His praise. For when you assemble frequently in the same place, the powers of Satan are destroyed, and the destruction at which he aims is prevented by the unity of your faith.
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When I was 11, I decided to start rapping, playing guitar, and writing songs. Everything really blossomed from there.
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When I board an airplane these days, all the middle-aged men are dressed like me - when I was an 8-year-old. They're in shorts and T-shirts. And it's not just on airplanes. It's in business offices, teachers' lounges, and churches.
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It would be ridiculous to say I don't want to sell records, but I trust my taste.
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There wasn't so many ISSUES like there are today. It was a simpler time.
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Sometimes I think that when people become famous, there's a public perception that they are not human beings any more. They don't have feelings; they don't get hurt; you can act and say as you like about them.
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Many people in the West do not realise how oppressive some Muslim states are - both for men and for women. This is a cultural issue, not an Islamic one.
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America has absorbed people from around the world, and there is an Indian in every part of the world. This characterizes both the societies. Indians and Americans have co-existed in their natural temperament.
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I've spent my life visiting a handful of people who are very close to me when they've been committed to one hospital or another in New York.
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I would love to be a role model.
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You can't get married to any one particular plan. That is the biggest lesson I learned at PayPal.
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I don't think there's anything wrong with someone having to read a poem twice. Or even a book.
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When I was a kid in New York I used to go to the zoo. I always liked the zoo. I grew up within walking distance of the Bronx Zoo. And then when my first two children were young, I used to take them to the zoo. Zoos are always interesting. And I make pictures.
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As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'
