Jim Gaffigan Quotes

As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'

Jim Gaffigan

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• Cancer
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Quotes to Explore

• I was involved with drama departments since the 5th grade. I played at it. It was an escape.

  

  Adam Baldwin
  • Drama
  • Involved
  • Escape

• It would be hard to ignore the absence of democracy in any Arab nation.

  

  Jack Schwartz
  • Democracy
  • Ignore
  • Nation

• I listen to 'deep dish house'.

  

  T. J. Miller
  • House
  • Deep
  • Listen

• Here or henceforward it is all the same to me, I accept Time absolutely.

  

  Walt Whitman
  • Time
  • Me
  • Accept

• The nature of good fiction is that it dwells in ambiguity.

  

  E. L. Doctorow
  • Good
  • Nature
  • Fiction

• You know something, if you're not acting, you're not an actor - you've gotta work. No way around it.

  

  Lance Henriksen
  • Work
  • Know
  • Acting

• All achievements, all earned riches, have their beginning in an idea.

  

  Napoleon Hill
  • Beginning
  • Idea
  • Riches

• I just go in the studio and write on the spot and see what comes out.

  

  Beck
  • Write
  • Just
  • Go

• Always just remember that you can never know all; you're always going to be learning; there's always going to be something new. I don't think you'll ever have it all figured out.

  

  Iain De Caestecker
  • Remember
  • Know
  • Learning

• I've always had this sneaking suspicion that I get a kick out of the insecurity.

  

  Samantha Bond
  • Always
  • Insecurity
  • Out

• You have to train people how to be business innovators. If you don't train them, the quality of the ideas that you get in an innovation marketplace is not likely to be high.

  

  Gary Hamel
  • People
  • Business
  • High

• Take heed, then, often to come together to give thanks to God, and show forth His praise. For when you assemble frequently in the same place, the powers of Satan are destroyed, and the destruction at which he aims is prevented by the unity of your faith.

  

  Ignatius of Antioch
  • God
  • Together
  • Faith

• When I was 11, I decided to start rapping, playing guitar, and writing songs. Everything really blossomed from there.

  

  Becky G
  • Writing
  • Start
  • Guitar

• When I board an airplane these days, all the middle-aged men are dressed like me - when I was an 8-year-old. They're in shorts and T-shirts. And it's not just on airplanes. It's in business offices, teachers' lounges, and churches.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • Men
  • Business
  • Me

• It would be ridiculous to say I don't want to sell records, but I trust my taste.

  

  Thebe Neruda Kgositsile
  • Want
  • Trust
  • Ridiculous

• There wasn't so many ISSUES like there are today. It was a simpler time.

  

  Wanda Jackson
  • Time
  • Today
  • Like

• Sometimes I think that when people become famous, there's a public perception that they are not human beings any more. They don't have feelings; they don't get hurt; you can act and say as you like about them.

  

  Salman Rushdie
  • People
  • Hurt
  • Famous

• Sober up, and you see and hear everything you'd been able to avoid hearing before.

  

  Sammy Davis, Jr.
  • Up
  • You
  • See

• Many people in the West do not realise how oppressive some Muslim states are - both for men and for women. This is a cultural issue, not an Islamic one.

  

  Hamza Yusuf
  • People
  • Men
  • Women

• I remember telling my mom, 'Mom, I'm gay, but I'm not going to march in a parade or anything.' That's what I was telling my parents and all my friends and everything. I'm gay, but I'm not going to be on a float or something. Cut to five years later, and I was the grand marshal of the gay pride parade.

  

  Jonathan Groff
  • Friends
  • Remember
  • Parents

• France always had this balanced position that in so many conflicts was the voice of peace. I intend to maintain that. De Gaulle was pleading for a multipolar world.

  

  Marine Le Pen
  • World
  • Peace

• You will be courteous to your elders who have explored to the point from which you may advance; and helpful to your juniors who will progress farther by reason of your labors.

  

  A. Lawrence Lowell
  • May
  • Progress
  • Helpful

• As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • People
  • World
  • Cancer