Jim Gaffigan Quotes

As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'

Jim Gaffigan

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Quotes to Explore

• Definitely for me, my personality, having children was a definite sea change. I found it very, very hard to balance show business and being a dad. The narcissism of show business and the complete, total focus of it was very difficult.

  

  Dana Carvey
  • Children
  • Business
  • Change

• I was involved with drama departments since the 5th grade. I played at it. It was an escape.

  

  Adam Baldwin
  • Drama
  • Escape
  • Involved

• It would be hard to ignore the absence of democracy in any Arab nation.

  

  Jack Schwartz
  • Democracy
  • Ignore
  • Nation

• I listen to 'deep dish house'.

  

  T. J. Miller
  • House
  • Deep
  • Listen

• Here or henceforward it is all the same to me, I accept Time absolutely.

  

  Walt Whitman
  • Time
  • Me
  • Accept

• The nature of good fiction is that it dwells in ambiguity.

  

  E. L. Doctorow
  • Good
  • Nature
  • Fiction

• You know something, if you're not acting, you're not an actor - you've gotta work. No way around it.

  

  Lance Henriksen
  • Work
  • Know
  • Acting

• All achievements, all earned riches, have their beginning in an idea.

  

  Napoleon Hill
  • Beginning
  • Idea
  • Riches

• I just go in the studio and write on the spot and see what comes out.

  

  Beck
  • Write
  • Just
  • Go

• In the British Special Air Service, combat fitness is all about running.

  

  Bear Grylls
  • Running
  • Air
  • Service

• Always just remember that you can never know all; you're always going to be learning; there's always going to be something new. I don't think you'll ever have it all figured out.

  

  Iain De Caestecker
  • Remember
  • Know
  • Learning

• I've always had this sneaking suspicion that I get a kick out of the insecurity.

  

  Samantha Bond
  • Always
  • Insecurity
  • Out

• You have to train people how to be business innovators. If you don't train them, the quality of the ideas that you get in an innovation marketplace is not likely to be high.

  

  Gary Hamel
  • People
  • Business
  • High

• Take heed, then, often to come together to give thanks to God, and show forth His praise. For when you assemble frequently in the same place, the powers of Satan are destroyed, and the destruction at which he aims is prevented by the unity of your faith.

  

  Ignatius of Antioch
  • God
  • Together
  • Faith

• When I was 11, I decided to start rapping, playing guitar, and writing songs. Everything really blossomed from there.

  

  Becky G
  • Writing
  • Start
  • Guitar

• I'm a believer in home-made recipes and concoctions, so I stick to natural or herbal products as much as I can. I also meditate regularly to de-stress.

  

  Yami Gautam
  • Home
  • Stress
  • Natural

• When I board an airplane these days, all the middle-aged men are dressed like me - when I was an 8-year-old. They're in shorts and T-shirts. And it's not just on airplanes. It's in business offices, teachers' lounges, and churches.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • Men
  • Business
  • Me

• It would be ridiculous to say I don't want to sell records, but I trust my taste.

  

  Thebe Neruda Kgositsile
  • Want
  • Trust
  • Ridiculous

• When I see a spade, I call it a spade. I'm glad to say I have never seen a spade. The man who would call a spade a spade should be compelled to use it. It's the only thing he's fit for.

  

  Oscar Wilde
  • Man
  • See
  • Thing

• I love animals, and I feel more of a connection to animals than people.

  

  Kaley Cuoco
  • People
  • Connection
  • Animals

• A lot of people go, "I'm influenced by the Beatles and Zeppelin," and they just sound like a karaoke.

  

  Phil Collen Def Leppard
  • People
  • Influenced
  • Karaoke

• Even perfect program verification can only establish that a program meets its specification. … Much of the essence of building a program is in fact the debugging of the specification.

  

  Fred Brooks
  • Perfect

• I encourage people to get a village so that there will always be someone who's like family looking out for your child.

  

  Kym Whitley
  • People
  • Family

• As I go on in standup, I keep being described as cleaner and cleaner as I do each hour, they're like, 'It's unbelievable how clean,' 'He's the cleanest person in the world.' And then I'll do shows and people will be like, 'You're supposed to be so clean, but you're talking about cancer.'

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • People
  • World
  • Cancer