Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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I do have friends who make movies, but for the most part, I never really wanted to feel like I was part of an industry.
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I walked in thinking, 'I have ten movies under my belt and now they want me to go back to making commercials?' I said, if I do that, I want it to be funny.
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I just mean it's very difficult for me to watch my work, in some ways, because I am critical of what I didn't get across or I thought I was making one point.
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We clearly realize that freedom's inner kingdom cannot be touched by exterior attacks.
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I lost my faith in God when I lost my daughter to Cancer, the beast. I begged, I cried, I offered my life for hers, and day by day, I watched that beautiful little Angel slip off. So, excuse me for not taking my seat next to you on Sunday in Church, I feel too cheated to worship.
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I like David Lynch; I like Stanley Kubrick. I'm a big fan of Kubrick.
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Ants are more like the parts of an animal than entities on their own. They are mobile cells, circulating through a dense connective tissue of other ants in a matrix of twigs. The circuits are so intimately interwoven that the anthill meets all the essential criteria of an organism.
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Plus the public's attention span is so short right now, if a skater doesn't strike while the iron is hot... well it's not like people will forget you, but they just won't care anymore.
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I'm actually a huge fan of changing every single 'anti-Trump' sentiment to 'pro-human rights' because they are synonymous.
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I would love to work in America. I wouldn't love to live there, but I'd love to experience working there.
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But I went to the University of Texas in the 30s, and while there I learned to ride. Mostly polo ponies.
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Today, the Federal minimum wage purchases less than it has at any point in the last 50 years. Let me repeat: The Federal minimum wage purchases less than it has at any point in the last 50 years.
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Friends would not say I'm a laid-back person by any means.
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There are a lot of downsides to being male. We age faster and die younger. But give us this: we're lifetime baby-making machines. Women's reproductive abilities start to wane when they're as young as 35. Men? We're good to go pretty much till we're dead.
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I have been in love, and in debt, and in drink, this many and many a year.
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Yeah, I'd done a bunch of pilots. Some that had gone for a while. One that went for 13 episodes. But I had never been on a show that had lasted more than that.
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Facebook is about sharing experiences that you've had. Foursquare is more about the present tense and the future tense.
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I didn't come out until 5 or 6 o'clock in the evening. Sleep all day, sleep and cook and eat, stay in the house. That sun is hot, anyway. It ain't right out there.
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The music of an unhappy people, of the children of disappointment; they tell of death and suffering and unvoiced longing toward a truer world, of misty wanderings and hidden ways.
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Let's talk of graves, of worms, and epitaphs; Make dust our paper, and with rainy eyes Write sorrow on the bosom of the earth.... [W]hat can we bequeath, Save our deposed bodies to the ground?... [N]othing can we call our own, but death... [L]et us sit upon the ground, And tell sad stories of the death of kings: - How some have been depos'd, some slain in war; Some haunted by the ghosts they have depos'd.
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What exactly are the ingredients of Ranch dressing? Mayo and disappointment?
