Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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The reason for not getting married was that I just didn't have a partner to get married to. Climbing mountains was more attractive to me than marriage, or other fun things like that.
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I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than teach ten thousand stars how not to dance.
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I saw what the Depression was doing to my students. Often they could get no jobs, or jobs which were wholly inadequate. And through them, I began to understand how deeply political and economic events could affect men's lives. I began to feel the need to participate more fully in the life of the community.
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We live in an inter-dependent world. An isolated India is not in our interest.
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I want to keep a thread between the studio and the stage, and I want to flow more easily from one to the other.
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Every body about me seem'd happy but every body seem'd in a hurry to be happy somewhere else.
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You're going to have some ups and downs, so you have to prepare yourself to be ready. Those down moments come.
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I'd been touring for so long, seven years. For a year and a half I'd just been curious about what it was like not to tour. It's like if you were to lift a 100-pound barbell with your right arm for seven years, eventually you'd get really curious about what your left arm was capable of.
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If vaudeville had died, television was the box they put it in.
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My dad met my mom at Casper College in the orientation line. He studied business and eventually transferred to the University of Wyoming at Laramie.
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For a black male, the sound of the blues is pre-Civil Rights. It's oppression.
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I've written a screenplay that is a series of monologues and songs; they form this sort of human tapestry across time and place. The form is strange, but I find it really fascinating.
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I always believed in if you give your best, people will see it, and it moves to the next level. I got my first movie, and I gave it my best. Before I was done with that movie, I was offered my first feature film.
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I have always been grateful to Colonel Longley. He proved to me that when people in authority take a stand, good can come out of it.
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I'm excellent at losing weight, but I've never been excellent at maintenance. I have some better days than others in terms of being hypervigilant, but with maintenance you don't know if you've been good at it until you're done.
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There are those who seem to feel they have no choice about being jerks in the present because they had a crappy childhood. Well, that's the definition of childhood; nobody gets out alive. You either get stronger from what you experience, or you turn it into a crutch, an excuse, a dodge.
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There seems to be some perverse human characteristic that likes to make easy things difficult.
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Adequacy is sufficient.
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A 'diet' is simply an individual's eating regimen: it doesn't have to mean the restrictive plan we've come to associate this word with.
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Major league baseball is about the history of the game. Baseball history is so important. It's so much more than money.
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A lot of people come up to me all the time and say thank you for helping me be who I am. So my thing wasn't just about sexuality. It was about anyone who felt different; anyone who felt out of place. Being gay was one part of it.
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A carefree quality is a whole aspect of life that I will never understand. I don't think I have ever been carefree and can't see the pleasure of it.
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I went to an art high school in Washington D.C., and I majored in visual art. When I started there, I was horrible - couldn't draw, couldn't sketch, couldn't do anything. I remember at one point I came to terms with the fact that I had to work my ass off to do well and that's exactly what I did. I drew and drew and drew, and it worked - I ended up getting the award for best artist and went on to apply to design school because I loved it so much. I think it really speaks to the idea that you can in fact excel at whatever you put your mind and your heart to.
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Whenever you correct someone's grammar just remember that nobody likes you.
