Jim Gaffigan Quotes

I'm kind of like a guy who's missing a little bit of the guy gene. Like, I love steak, but the notion of golfing is the last thing I would want to do. I love women, but I'm also a mama's boy, and some of my best friends are women. So I'm kinda half guy's guy.

Jim Gaffigan

• Guy
• Kind
• Missing
• Boys
• Genes
• Golfing

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Quotes to Explore

• Why is it that our young kids all across America can solve the most complex problems in a video game involving executive decision making and analytical thinking, yet we accept the fact that they can't add or read?

  

  Naveen Jain
  • Thinking
  • Why
  • Kids

• I am a reluctant celebrity, in some ways.

  

  Sade Adu
  • Celebrity
  • Ways

• Hebrew is the language I use to thank the Creator and, also, to swear on the road.

  

  Yair Lapid
  • Road
  • Language
  • Creator

• Question the motives of those who make requests of you. Discover what they really want. You may not want to give it.

  

  Vernon Howard
  • May
  • Want
  • Question

• In U.S. sports, you tend to be pretty strictly limited by the size of your team's market. When we heard that Villa was a club here that might be available, I had a strong feeling that a team in the West Midlands could be the chance to create something very special.

  

  Randy Lerner
  • Pretty
  • Strong
  • Feeling

• And as long as people want to hear me sing, I don't know why I'd retire.

  

  Tanya Tucker
  • People
  • Want
  • Me

• All of my songs are autobiographical.

  

  Taylor Swift
  • Songs
  • Autobiographical

• Do not seek death. Death will find you. But seek the road which makes death a fulfillment.

  

  Dag Hammarskjold
  • Death
  • Road
  • Find

• How are we to live with the desert, in the desert, within the desert?

  

  Magnus Larsson
  • Live
  • Desert
  • Within

• Literature adds to reality, it does not simply describe it. It enriches the necessary competencies that daily life requires and provides; and in this respect, it irrigates the deserts that our lives have already become.

  

  C. S. Lewis
  • Life
  • Reality
  • Respect

• Customs form us all, our thoughts, our morals, our most fixed beliefs; are consequences of our place of birth.

  

  Aaron Hill
  • Thoughts
  • Consequences

• There are many who lust for the simple answers of doctrine or decree. They are on the left and right. They are not confined to a single part of the society. They are terrorists of the mind.

  

  A. Bartlett Giamatti
  • Mind
  • Society
  • Single

• I always see where I didn't do things the right way. I only see the heavy lifting. That's a bit of my wisdom, if you want to call it that.

  

  Vera Wang
  • Want
  • Wisdom
  • Always

• It's not the winter that bothers me – it's the summers.

  

  Walt Alston
  • Winter
  • Bothers
  • Summers

• My family were very poor. I am one of nine siblings: two girls and seven boys. Only my brother and I play in Europe, and then three more work in Europe, and another plays in Tunisia. This family is a footballing family, but our lives have not always been good.

  

  Yaya Toure
  • Good
  • Work
  • Family

• Life is too short to be on a diet.

  

  Taylor Jenkins Reid
  • Life
  • Life Is Too Short

• I see a lot of comments on Twitter and stuff about how ugly I am, how bad I am at the drums, how awkward I look, and I'm like, yeah, I agree with most of those things.

  

  Patrick Carney The Black Keys
  • Twitter
  • Awkward
  • Drums

• If you actively do something, it will stop making you feel like a victim and you'll start feeling like part of the solution, which is just a huge benefit to your body and your psyche.

  

  Ted Danson
  • Feeling
  • Stop
  • Body

• Joyous Sound evolved from a gospel influence. Actually it evolved out of sitting at a piano and just picking out a riff, a gospel type riff. It just seemed to come joyously-something about the song, about living in another place of joyous sounds. I'm not quite sure-that's one I'm trying to analyze. It just came out.

  

  Van Morrison
  • Trying
  • Song
  • Piano

• If you have a kid who goes to kindergarten and doesn't know what a circle is, doesn't know what red and green are, and doesn't know what right and left are, by the time he learns those things, the rest of the class is far ahead of him.

  

  C. Everett Koop
  • Time
  • Rest
  • Red

• I wish I were with some of the wild people that run in the woods, and know nothing about accomplishments!

  

  Joanna Baillie
  • People
  • Wish

• I never had crushes on anybody when I was younger; I really didn't.

  

  Kate Winslet
  • Never
  • Younger
  • Anybody

• It's not Cam's fault," Bex told her. "We rigged her bed so that if she gets up, I get an electric shock." "Liz designed it," Macey said, and Bex shrugged "We told you we were taking precautions." Of course. Because at Gallagher Academy, "precautions" usually equals "voluntary shock therapy".

  

  Ally Carter
  • Fault
  • Therapy
  • Precautions

• I'm kind of like a guy who's missing a little bit of the guy gene. Like, I love steak, but the notion of golfing is the last thing I would want to do. I love women, but I'm also a mama's boy, and some of my best friends are women. So I'm kinda half guy's guy.

  

  Jim Gaffigan
  • Guy
  • Kind
  • Missing