Jim Gaffigan Quotes
The reason I say I'm a horrible person is I don't want myself to be presented as somebody who's a great Catholic.

Quotes to Explore
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Like many people in Britain, I have an affectionate respect for the Queen, and am surprised that I should be having such republican thoughts.
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Along with issues like global warming, I think a problem with the world today is population decline.
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No one likes to be criticized, of course, but if the things we successfully strive for do not make our future selves happy, or if the things we unsuccessfully avoid do, then it seems reasonable (if somewhat ungracious) for them to cast a disparaging glance backward and wonder what the hell we were thinking.
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People are getting careers from YouTube and uploading videos. And they're totally different - you can't necessarily be funny on a video, and then all of a sudden you're live in a theater. You don't have the tools yet. It's a lot more involved to go from being funny on a little iPhone screen to being live in front of people and being funny.
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Memory... is the diary that we all carry about with us.
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I'm not interested in celebrity.
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There is a great relief in experiencing the worst vicariously.
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In middle school, I had an '87 Regal. That was unheard of.
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Mr. Idris Elba is amazing! He happens to be British, but what's funny about him is that when he's speaking in his American dialect, he looks like he's a brother from the 'hood. But as soon as he brings out that English thing, I'm like, 'Woo! You look like you're from London. Oh my God!' It's like everything on him changes. He's so cool!
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I was afraid the other musicians might want to present themselves too much, though I see in the coverage I've received of the album that the musicians got wonderful reviews for their contributions and abilities. I think the four musicians played freely within my limits.
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Foreigners don't want to invest any more in France - and this is not working.
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I used to get 2000 as pocket money, and I was being offered a car and an opportunity to make lakhs, so I said a yes. I was a kid and got homesick over my 40-day schedule in Bangalore and decided that I would only do films in the South if they were 10-day roles.
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In America, we have the feeling of the doomed young artist. Fitzgerald was the great example of that.
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I'm the weird person who completely loved and devoured 'Middlemarch' but who has not finished far shorter and more readable books due to distraction or the fact that by some miracle I am sleeping through the night.
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I've always wanted to sing, just as I've always known that one day I would have my own niche in the annals of song. It was a feeling I had.
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I was really ambitious, so I was innovative. I was one of the first DJs to do live calls, 'cause I found this phone device that would pick up other people's voices.
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ER was one of my favourites. I played a car accident victim who has leukemia. I got to wear a neck brace and nose tubes for the two days I worked.
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I used to spend a lot of time alone as a kid, creating characters and doing voices in my room, and I thought to myself, I'm either going to go absolutely nuts, or I'm going to find something to put that energy into.
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Warner Brothers had to hire [a stunt double] and no one thought a child could do this. Billy Friedkin came to me before we were filming [The Exorcist] and said ,if you do not do all of this film, the film will be a joke.It's why they stripped the makeup down to the bare minimum, a piece on my chin, piece across my mouth that disfigured my mouth. You have scars here. Take away my eyebrows. It was my real hair. Shampoo was put in it that dried.
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There's more to being a human being than having your own way.
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So I try not to look too far into the future because I think that everything happens and will happen for a reason.
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The reason I say I'm a horrible person is I don't want myself to be presented as somebody who's a great Catholic.