John Mulaney Quotes

You can't always see both sides of the story. Eventually, you have to pick a side and stick with it. No more equivocating. You have to commit.

John Mulaney

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Quotes to Explore

• If only Queen Elizabeth II had the intellectual, political and linguistic skills of Queen Elizabeth I, many people would support giving her some of the powers of an elected president.

  

  A. N. Wilson
  • People
  • Political
  • Giving

• The chief incalculable in war is the human will.

  

  B. H. Liddell Hart
  • War
  • Human
  • Will

• I always say three things make a writer: inspiration, obviously; perspiration, doing the work. But the third is desperation. I'm not really fit for anything else, or to have a real job. That fear drives me. The pressure has always been self inflicted.

  

  Harlan Coben
  • Job
  • Inspiration
  • Writer

• As cheesy as it sounds, all my eggs were never in just one basket. I had a thousand baskets going on.

  

  Kaley Cuoco
  • Never
  • Cheesy
  • Eggs

• As governor, I'm spending my time focused in three areas: creating jobs, reducing the expense of government and schools.

  

  Jack Markell
  • Time
  • Government
  • Three

• I come from really humble people. We never had a lot.

  

  La'Porsha Renae
  • People
  • Never
  • Humble

• I used to think drinking was the only way to be happy. Now I know there is no way to be happy.

  

  Laura Kightlinger
  • Happy
  • Think
  • Drinking

• There will not be a billion-shekel cut to education on my watch.

  

  Naftali Bennett
  • Education
  • Will
  • Watch

• I used to work at NASA in Virginia. It was nothing glamorous; I was just tasked with making code compile for obscure projects, and I wasn't very good at it. Now I spend most of my time drawing pictures and looking at funny things on the Internet, which in retrospect is largely what I did at my old job, too.

  

  Randall Munroe
  • Time
  • Good
  • Work

• The marathon always starts after 30K. That's where the problems start. You start without any problems, without any pain. All the pain comes after 30K. Sometimes, it's possible to have pain even in the finger.

  

  Haile Gebrselassie
  • Pain
  • Problems
  • Start

• I've got a publicist at Houghton Mifflin Harcourt who's been working little miracles for me, but it's true the budgets aren't what they once were in terms of advertisement and book tours.

  

  Patrick deWitt
  • Book
  • True
  • Me

• If you're clever enough and creative enough to get a good film made, then you should be clever enough and creative enough to find ways to get it out there, one being something like Jameson First Shot.

  

  Dana Brunetti
  • Good
  • Find
  • Creative

• When you are down and out something always turns up - and it is usually the noses of your friends.

  

  Orson Welles
  • Up
  • Friends
  • Always

• I realize it's a cliche almost, that coming out of the closet is a very healthy and empowering thing to do, but for me, it really has been a truly wonderful thing.

  

  B. D. Wong
  • Me
  • Healthy
  • Realize

• The Turkish, Arab and Chinese nationalists who built new nation-states out of the ruins of old empires scorned their old, decrepit rulers as much as they did the foreign imperialists who imposed free trade through gunboats.

  

  Pankaj Mishra
  • Free
  • Chinese
  • New

• I love '80s horror.

  

  A. J. Bowen
  • Love
  • I Love
  • Horror

• In an amusement park, you can go on a roller coaster that carries you up and down, or you can go on another kind of ride that whirls you around in a circle. Similarly, there are different sorts of entertaining experiences in the theater.

  

  Wallace Shawn
  • Up
  • Different
  • Kind

• Certainly Nancy Reagan had an extraordinary effect on her husband. I'm truly not sure that, say, Laura Bush had that much effect on the Bush administration. She certainly, you know, seems to be a nice person who I think the public likes. But I can't really put my finger on any huge impact she's had.

  

  Gail Collins
  • She
  • Think
  • Nice

• Any critic of Cezanne who described him as a painter of country scenes would be moving in the wrong direction. You must begin with the question of style . . .

  

  Charles Tomlinson
  • Moving
  • Style
  • Wrong

• For many characters, the prospect of having a child in their life brings up a lot of issues about their own parents. And who doesn't love that? Bad mommy or daddy issues are a delicious staple in romance novels.

  

  Molly O'Keefe
  • Romance
  • Having
  • Daddy

• Oh! captive, bound, and double-ironed," cried the phantom, "not to know, that ages of incessant labour, by immortal creatures, for this earth must pass into eternity before the good of which it is susceptible is all developed. Not to know that any Christian spirit working kindly in its little sphere, whatever it may be, will find its mortal life too short for its vast means of usefulness. Not to know that no space of regret can make amends for one life's opportunity misused!

  

  Charles Dickens
  • Opportunity
  • Christian
  • Spirit

• You can't always see both sides of the story. Eventually, you have to pick a side and stick with it. No more equivocating. You have to commit.

  

  John Mulaney