Paul Merton Quotes
My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I've endured over the past twenty-five years.

Quotes to Explore
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Money opens up wonderful worlds of possibilities.
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You know, I think I still have a sense that no matter what you do, no matter what you achieve, no matter how much success you have, no matter how much money you have, relationships are important.
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Pursuit and seduction are the essence of sexuality. It's part of the sizzle.
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It's true that you need much time to get rid of the fat girl you once were, but you know I am sincerely grateful for my buttocks.
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There comes a time when every scientist, even God, has to write off an experiment.
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I will always be the way I was a couple years ago before anything happened. And that's to my parents' credit, my amazing parents who have been around me my whole life and raised me right. I'm very happy with what has happened so far.
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I think my best friend is dry shampoo and dry texturizer spray.
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In the Senate, you can become one of the nation's leading voices on the issues.
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'The Simpsons' money got bigger and bigger. When I left 'The Simpsons', no one thought that this thing was going to still be around. It's the cumulative effect. It's like, 'Oh my God, 25 years later, and it's still coming in.'
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Jerusalem is united, will never be divided again.
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Any committee is only as good as the most knowledgeable, determined and vigorous person on it. There must be somebody who provides the flame.
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The American principles of democracy expresses the deepest values of the Sharia both structurally and in the government... Sharia requires us Muslims anywhere to abide by the law of the land.
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Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us.
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Spiritual power is the eternal guide, in this life and the life after, for man ranks supreme among all creatures. Led forward by spiritual power, man can reach the summit destined for him by the Great Creator.
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When you go to bed, don't leave bread or milk on the table: it attracts the dead.
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Apart from cheese and tulips, the main product of the country is advocaat, a drink made from lawyers.
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I don't think if you asked any of my childhood friends they would say that I had a weird childhood; they might say there weren't a lot of regular rules, the conversations in the house were always very open, dreams were a great thing to talk about, everybody was making something all the time.
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Companies buy customers when they cannot win new business on their own. They merge when their executives do not have a better idea of what to do.
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We have to show people we are willing to adapt to their world.
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English is the product of a Saxon warrior trying to make a date with an Angle bar-maid, and as such is no more legitimate than any of the other products of that conversation.
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And yet without labour there were no ease, no rest, so much as conceivable.
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I'm a really, really optimistic and really, really positive person. My main thing is, 'Enjoy life. Celebrate life.'
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The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.
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My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I've endured over the past twenty-five years.