Hector Hugh Munro Quotes
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People may say what they like about the decay of Christianity the religious system that produced green Chartreuse can never really die.
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Her frocks are built in Paris, but she wears them with a strong English accent.
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All decent people live beyond their incomes; those who aren't respectable live beyond other people's; a few gifted individuals manage to do both.
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He spends his life explaining from his pulpit that the glory of Christianity consists in the fact that though it is not true it has been found necessary to invent it.
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Never be a pioneer. It's the early Christian that gets the fattest lion.
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Sherard Blaw, the dramatist who had discovered himself, and who had given so ungrudgingly of his discovery to the world.
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If he had unlimited money at his disposal, he might go into the wilds somewhere and shoot big game. I never know what the big game have done to deserve it, but they do help to deflect the destructive energies of some of our social misfits.
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Find yourself a cup; the teapot is behind you. Now tell me about hundreds of things.
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But, good gracious, you've got to educate him first. You can't expect a boy to be vicious till he's been to a good school.
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The fashion just now is a Roman Catholic frame of mind with an Agnostic conscience: you get the mediaeval picturesqueness of the one with the modern conveniences of the other.
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I am not collecting copies of the cheaper editions of Omar Khayyám. I gave the last four that I received to the lift-boy, and I like to think of him reading them, with FitzGerald's notes, to his aged mother. Lift-boys always have aged mothers; shows such nice feeling on their part, I think.
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It occurred to me that I would like to be a poet. The chief qualification, I understand is that you must be born. Well, I hunted up my birth certificate, and found that I was all right on that score.
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It is an admitted fact that the ordinary tomtit of commerce has a sounder aesthetic taste than the average female relative in the country.
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I hate posterity - it's so fond of having the last word.
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It is one of the consolations of middle aged reformers that the good that they inculcate must live after them if it is to live at all.
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When people grow gradually rich their requirements and standard of living expand in proportion, while their present-giving instincts often remain in the undeveloped condition of their earlier days. Something showy and not-too-expensive in a shop is their only conception of the ideal gift.
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We all know that Prime Ministers are wedded to the truth, but like other wedded couples they sometimes live apart.
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Romance at short notice was her speciality.
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Women and elephants never forget an injury.
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Confront a child, a puppy, and a kitten with a sudden danger; the child will turn instinctively for assistance, the puppy will grovel in abject submission, the kitten will brace its tiny body for a frantic resistance.
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Whenever a massacre of Armenians is reported from Asia Minor, every one assumes that it has been carried out "under orders" from somewhere or another; no one seems to think that there are people who might like to kill their neighbours now and then.
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Oysters are more beautiful than any religion... There's nothing in Christianity or Buddhism that quite matches the sympathetic unselfishness of an oyster.
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The young have aspirations that never come to pass, the old have reminiscences of what never happened.
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A relative of mine ... spends his time producing improved breeds of sheep and pigs and chickens. So patronising and irritating to teh Almighty, I should think.