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A relative of mine ... spends his time producing improved breeds of sheep and pigs and chickens. So patronising and irritating to teh Almighty, I should think.
Hector Hugh Munro -
The people of Crete unfortunately make more history than they can consume locally.
Hector Hugh Munro
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Children are given us to discourage our better emotions.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Oysters are more beautiful than any religion... There's nothing in Christianity or Buddhism that quite matches the sympathetic unselfishness of an oyster.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Addresses are given to us to conceal our whereabouts.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Hors d'oeuvres have always a pathetic interest for me; they remind me of one's childhood that one goes through wondering what the next course is going to be like - and during the rest of the menu one wishes one had eaten more of the hors d'oeuvres.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Great Socialist statesmen aren't made, they're still-born.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Sophie Chattel-Monkheim was a Socialist by conviction and a Chattel-Monkheim by marriage.
Hector Hugh Munro
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People talk vaguely about the innocence of a little child, but they take mighty good care not to let it out of their sight for twenty minutes.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Women and elephants never forget an injury.
Hector Hugh Munro -
The cook was a good cook, as cooks go; and as cooks go, she went.
Hector Hugh Munro -
To be among people who are smothered in furs when one hasn't any oneself makes one want to break most of the Commandments.
Hector Hugh Munro -
I hate babies. They're so human.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Poverty keeps together more homes than it breaks up.
Hector Hugh Munro
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Hating anything in the way of ill-natured gossip ourselves, we are always grateful to those who do it for us and do it well.
Hector Hugh Munro -
I always say beauty is only sin deep.
Hector Hugh Munro -
It's no use growing older if you only learn new ways of misbehaving yourself.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Life is full of its disappointments, and I suppose the art of being happy is to disguise them as illusions.
Hector Hugh Munro -
Children with Hyacinth's temperament don't know better as they grow older; they merely know more.
Hector Hugh Munro -
There may have been disillusionments in the lives of the medieval saints, but they would scarcely have been better pleased if they could have foreseen that their names would be associated nowadays chiefly with racehorses and the cheaper clarets.
Hector Hugh Munro
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Every reformation must have its victims. You can’t expect the fatted calf to share the enthusiasm of the angels over the prodigal’s return.
Hector Hugh Munro -
I think she must have been very strictly brought up, she's so desperately anxious to do the wrong thing correctly.
Hector Hugh Munro -
There are certain fixed rules that one observes for one's own comfort. For instance, never be flippantly rude to any inoffensive grey-bearded stranger that you may meet in pine forests or hotel smoking-rooms on the Continent. It always turns out to be the King of Sweden.
Hector Hugh Munro -
He's simply got the instinct for being unhappy highly developed.
Hector Hugh Munro