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	He doesn’t love me. He might still love me as I was at fifteen, when I didn’t know any better. When I trusted everyone. I’m not that person any more. He’s just a boy. He was the first to really hurt me, but he’s just a boy. There were a lot of them.   
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	The worst thing you can do if you miss or need someone is let them know it.   
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	All the bitchy girls in the world are just a training ground for what men can do to you.   
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	I wasn't sure what I expected her to do or say to this. It was all new to me from that second on. But clearly, she'd been there before. It was obvious in the easy way she shrugged off her bag, letting it fall with a thump onto the sand, before sitting down beside me. She didn't pull me close for a big bonding hug or offer up some saccharine words of comfort, both of which would have sent me running for sure. Instead she gave me nothing but her company, realizing even before I did this that this, in fact, was just what I needed.   
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	Despite our differences, we did have a history. No one understood where I was coming from the way he did.   
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	Sitting there with them, it was almost hard to remember when I first came to Perkins, so determined to remember to be a one-woman operation to the end. But that was the thing about taking help and giving it, or so I was learning; there was no such thing as really getting even. Instead, this connection, once opened, remained ongoing over time.   
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	True friendship is a promise you keep forever.   
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	It doesn't matter, anyway, why you like me. Just that you do.   
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	He always did the leaving. But not this time. She kept walking, and did not look back.   
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	That was the hard thing about grief, and the grieving. They spoke another language, and the words we knew always fell short of what we wanted them to say.   
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	My books are so tame!   
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	Why don't you ever wait a second and see what I'm planning, or thinking, before you burst in with your opinions and ideas? You never even give me a chance.   
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	If you didn't love him, this never would have happened. But you did. And accepting that love and everything that followed it is part of letting it go.   
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	Get back on that bike.   
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	Looking back, it seemed like it should have been harder to lose someone, or have them lose you, especially when they were in the same state, only a few towns over.   
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	But sometimes you lose. Nothing you can do but admit it. -Eli   
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	And so really, you have given me no choice but to take you shopping by force.” She sighed, then reached up, dropping her sunglasses down from their perch on her head to cover her eyes. “Do you even realize how happy the average teenage girl would be in your shoes? I have a credit card. We’re at the mall. I want to buy you things. It’s like adolescent nirvana.” - Cora   
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	I can say I made a lot of mistakes, but I don't regret things. Because at least I didn't spend a life standing outside, wondering what living would be like.   
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	I would have thought this would make me feel better.. getting to be the one to leave and not the one left behind. But it didn't. Not at all.   
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	So many times it seemed like there were chances to stop things before they started. Or even stop them in midstream. But it was even worse when you knew in that very moment that there was still time to save yourself, and yet you couldn't even budge.   
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	People don't change. If anything, you get more set in your ways as you get older, not less   
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	In midair, dangling lost above the world.   
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	But it was okay not to fit in everywhere, as long as you did somewhere.   
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	I had to wonder whether it was possible that this wasn’t already decided for me, and if maybe, just maybe, this was my one last chance to try and prove it. There was no way to know. There never is. But I reached out and took it anyway.   
