Maddox Quotes

United States, Writer
1978

Maddox is the pen name of George Ouzounian, an American humorist, satirist, Internet personality, and author. He gained fame on the Internet in the early 2000s for his opinion-oriented website, The Best Page in the Universe, which he still maintains. His first book, The Alphabet of Manliness (2006), became a New York Times bestseller. He is a graduate of Woods Cross High School in Woods Cross, Utah; he also attended the University of Utah, but does not hold a degree.

Also known as Humorist

If women ran the world, we'd still be searching for the wheel.

Maddox
- World
- Women
The only thing that goes with Crocs is social Ostracism.

Maddox

I don't get it: they re-package the same shitty football games every year, update a few stats, call it a new game and millions of suckers keep buying them. What's the point? Why not just go outside and play real football instead? Or even better yet, get bent. Nobody likes football.

Maddox
- Real
- Why
- Game
Whales are drinking all our water and eating our sailors.

Maddox
- Water
- Drinking
If Manliness had a soundtrack, the score would be metal.

Maddox
Passing out while you try to kill yourself is like failing at failing.

Maddox
When the iPhone was first announced, CEO Steve Jobs spewed enough BS to cover a football field full of babies 3 feet deep in bullshit, which sounds cool because he could have potentially murdered a football field full of babies, but he passed on this opportunity by introducing the phone instead.

Maddox