Fran Lebowitz Quotes
No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.

Quotes to Explore
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I take care of my flowers and my cats. And enjoy food. And that's living.
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I've matured since joining United, on and off the field.
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I'm always on the phone because I'm usually not with the people I want to be with.
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We all had lots of stories of our sad experiences - they mourned the death of my wife with me - but we were hopeful that the children would return.
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The first thing I read was of my character on the phone talking to Sydney's fiance. Though short, it was so beautifully written, and it made me laugh. I thought if I wanted to play a character, this would be it.
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Raquel Welch is someone I can also live without. We've got some love scenes together and I am dreading them!
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One who works for his own profit is likely to work hard. One who works for the use of others, without profit to himself, is likely not to work any harder than he must.
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Cobnuts have a fresher flavour than any other nut I know of and go very well with autumnal fruit and light cheeses.
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Statesmanship is harder than politics. Politics is the art of getting along with people, whereas statesmanship is the art of getting along with politicians.
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I eat two breakfasts, two lunches, and two dinners throughout the day. It's always eating.
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Concepts of justice must have hands and feet to carry out justice in every case in the shortest possible time and the lowest possible cost. This is the challenge to every lawyer and judge in America.
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Music is pretty intimate stuff and I can only work with very few people: Gonzalez being one, Mocky being another and, on a completely different level, Broken Social Scene. With Broken Social Scene it's not one-on-one, it's a one-on-12. It's very healthy, very comfortable, like a big pot luck supper among old friends.
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I don't really see any barrier between teenage fiction and adult literature.
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Life is not easy in politics.
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Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else look bad. And I'm tired of making other people feel good about themselves.
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Acting was something I had to do.
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My fans don't feel like I hold anything back from them. They know whatever I'm going through now, they'll hear about it on a record someday. They'll hear the real story. There's a little bit of lag time. It's not as instant as going on a gossip blog. But it's much more accurate.
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Someone who knew me when I was 14 said I was the oldest 14-year-old on the planet. Now I'm a 14-year-old who is 60.
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Ninety percent of my clothes are women's.
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'The Simpsons' was about children and married parents; 'Futurama' is about people in between; they're growing up and haven't settled down. Every other cartoon show seemed to be, you know, dumb dad, bratty kids.
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Literally thousands of e-mails over the course of a book go out to people I've never met, people who might end up being the focus of a chapter.
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Many times, illusions or magic sets are designed as an exposition for the audience to watch, but the the style I do with the pickpocketing is directly interactive.
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My arrest in Egypt happened in 2002, and I was convicted to five years as a political prisoner.
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No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation.