P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

Some day you will be wheeled in for a heart bypass operation, and a surgeon will be the person who is now behind the counter when you renew your car registration at the department of motor vehicles.

Quotes to Explore
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I know one man who was impotent who gave AIDS to his wife and the only thing they did was kiss.
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Reading has been the fuel of my motivation: it has changed the direction in which I have traveled, and it has enhanced my creative imagination more than any other activity I have ever pursued.
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If I categorized home runs that I've seen, without a doubt the monumental one is Henry's... but I've seen a lot of classic, great home runs. Gibson's was probably the most theatrical home run I've ever seen.
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If you're only going to give away 50 percent of your wealth... c'mon. I'm going to do much more than that.
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I used to conduct the last opera in Berlin on Sunday, get on a plane on Monday to Chicago, and start a rehearsal that same night, if it was a performance week.
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I did every job under the sun from bartending to ushering to temping.
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Life is a dead-end street.
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I kept thinking I would be spending my life up to my elbows in shampoo.
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Faith is a higher faculty than reason.
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I'd rather betray the world than let the world betray me.
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Environmental concern is a phenomena that tends to rise in a nation after a certain level of wealth.
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I'm nearsighted in my right eye, have glaucoma in my left, and the nerves in my hands are on Medicare. Basically, I'm on the wrong end of a short sale.
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I had cooked a lot in restaurants, in Rocky Point and on golf courses on Long Island, and my mother said, 'Be a chef,' and my dad said, 'Be a lawyer.' But instead, I auditioned for N.Y.U.'s Tisch School of the Arts.
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We are the recipients of scientific method. We can each be a creative and active part of it if we so desire.
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I'm not a universalist, and the way I talk about final loss is this: People worship idols - money, whatever. Their humanness gets reshaped around the idol - you become like what you worship. That's one of the basic spiritual laws.
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My job is making money, helping other people make money. I am spending money, trying to make sure more people get rich, because you cannot spend a lot of money, right? So my job is spending money, helping others. This is a headache.
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The hero is one who kindles a great light in the world, who sets up blazing torches in the dark streets of life for men to see by.
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The truth is, I'm proud of the life I've lived so far, and though I've made my share of mistakes, I have no regrets.
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I am a competitive person. But more good TV is more good TV.
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When I was a kid growing up, we had a cherry tree in the backyard, 100 years old. I climbed it, and it gave shade in the summertime and excellent cherries in the late summer. Having cherry blossoms around gives the best springtime vibe ever.
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If people knew of ethics violations, they should have sent them to the Ethics Committee. If you think there was serious ethics violation that ought to be looked at, you don't hold it back for retaliatory purposes.
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In space, you need to exercise your heart since it's not pumping blood around at the same rate.
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Some day you will be wheeled in for a heart bypass operation, and a surgeon will be the person who is now behind the counter when you renew your car registration at the department of motor vehicles.