Aziz Ansari Quotes
Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
Quotes to Explore
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We're not a nation divided: we're a nation broken, and anything broken can be fixed.
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Tar sands oil is the dirtiest fuel on Earth. Because producing it consumes so much energy, a gallon of tar sands crude generates 17 percent more carbon pollution than conventional crude oil.
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I've just always been a bit of a dork.
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Every government says they love small businesses, but what have they done for them? We should pull down all the barriers.
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No one is born evil; it's just the choices that they make.
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The most merciful thing in the world... is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents.
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Water boarding: Is that like snowboarding?! 12.
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Those who think the information brought out at a criminal trial is the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth are fools. Prosecuting or defending a case is nothing more than getting to those people who will talk for your side, who will say what you want said.
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Truly I don't know what a 60-year chap is supposed to feel. I like doing some of the things that my son does. I love the kind of clothes the young wear. I love going to their hangouts. I love to talk like them. I'd love to be included in their evenings out, I don't see myself in a rocking chair reading a book.
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Welcome to the world of bullshit, my dear. You have arrived.
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Here in a little lonely roomI am master of earth and sea,And the planets come to me.
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We are over 60 percent water by weight. We're just a big ball of... blob of water, with enough organic thickener added so we don't dribble away on the floor.
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In some ways I was curt because there's an unbelievable amount to accomplish in a day.
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The political system loves the extremes, it doesn't so much show a lot love for the moderates.
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Many newly public companies are able to post a year or two of strong sales growth off a small base, but their growth almost always slows over time, thanks to what investment professionals call 'the law of large numbers.'
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The most I could hope for is to come and try and develop a character who is interesting, who is interesting to me, who is interesting to fans and who could contribute to the storytelling that is 'Law & Order: SVU.'
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I didn't want really to be involved in a normal soccer club.
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If you want to be that world champion, you have to be willing to beat anybody on this planet - no strings attached.
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Novelty is both delightful and deceptive.
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I'm no economist. I don't even play one on TV. I'm just a husband, a father, a taxpayer.
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Here comes 40. I'm feeling my age and I've ordered the Ferrari. I'm going to get the whole mid-life crisis package.
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There isn't a dude outside my dad who had greater influence on my life.
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Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.
