President Obama Quotes

• A new poll shows that Tiger Woods' popularity has dropped from 85 percent to 33 percent. President Obama's popularity is also at 33 percent, but Tiger had more fun getting there.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Fun
  • Tiger
  • Tiger Woods

• The Senate has sent President Obama a spending bill that gives the government enough money to keep going for two weeks. Our Congress has the financial planning skills of a college sophomore.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Money
  • College
  • Financial

• Overall, you know, no state in our country has been hurt more by the eight years of Barack Obama than Wyoming has been, and whether it's the absolutely unconstitutional role that the EPA is playing and the president trying to kill our coal industry - Wyoming is the nation's largest coal-producing state. So when President Obama and Hillary Clinton say they're gonna put coal out of business, it hits us harder than just about anyplace else.

  

  Liz Cheney
  • Country
  • Trying
  • Business

• Quietly, President Obama has done warrantless wire tapping. And it was hardly covered. I don't know if any of the mainstream press bothered to cover it.

  

  Cenk Uygur
  • Press
  • Cover
  • Wire tapping

• President Obama filled in as the coach of his daughter Sasha's basketball team. Sasha evidently listened to her Dad, because all she did was drive straight down the center and piss everyone off.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • She
  • Team
  • Dad

• I've never called President Obama a racist. I love President Obama. I pray for him all the time. God loves President Obama. God loves you. And God loves me.

  

  Alveda King
  • Time
  • God
  • Pray

• We know that Europe loves President Obama. He had adoring crowds. The press loves Obama. The question is how will this date end? Okay? The question is, to what end? Why do they love President Obama? They love his personal story, they love his wife. North Korea, China and Russia don't really care about Michelle's arms and, you know, whether they gave an iPod to the Queen, okay?

  

  Laura Ingraham
  • Europe
  • Loves
  • President Obama

• President Obama has appointed a transgender woman to a position in the Department of Commerce. You know, in this era of partisan bickering, President Obama deserves a lot of credit for taking a chance on Ann Coulter, I think.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • President Obama
  • Transgender
  • Department of Commerce

• President Obama says he will not support a healthcare plan where the government gets to decide whether to, quote, 'pull the plug on Grandma.' Apparently, Obama's plan calls for the much quicker pillow option.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Support
  • Option
  • Health care

• President Obama answered questions on YouTube today. He was asked 7,500 times about legalizing marijuana. And that was just from Chad in Portland.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Today
  • Marijuana
  • YouTube

• We know the president of the United States has no facts. No facts to back up his startling allegation that the former president of the United States, President Obama, wiretapped him in Trump Tower during the campaign.

  

  Anderson Cooper
  • Up
  • Trump
  • President

• President Obama and Vladimir Putin are both in China attending the same economic summit. Obama saw Putin and said, 'After those midterms, it's nice to finally see a friendly face.'

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Nice
  • Summit
  • Vladimir Putin

• President Obama has decided that he wants his presidential library to be in Chicago, not Hawaii. Today Hawaii's governor said, 'Great, who's going to want to come to Hawaii now?'

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Great
  • Today
  • Chicago

• A lawyer from Africa wants to marry Malia Obama in exchange for goats, sheep, and cows. In response, President Obama said, 'Don't be ridiculous. My daughter isn't marrying a lawyer.'

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Daughter
  • Lawyer
  • Africa

• A bank in Washington was robbed by two men in George W. Bush masks. Luckily, right afterwards two guys in President Obama masks came and bailed the bank out, so everything is fine.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Men
  • Guys
  • George W. Bush

• The Secret Service said there have been 40 fence-jumping incidents at the White House in the past five years. Half of them were intruders trying to get in. The other half was President Obama trying to get out.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Trying
  • House
  • Past

• The terrorist action of 9/11 gave birth to President Obama's entry to the White House. Not directly, but indirectly.

  

  Maya Angelou
  • Action
  • Birth
  • Terrorist

• The reality of split government puts a premium on creativity within the administration. President Obama needs to put the right people in charge of the agencies and then have them push the bounds of administrative power to change policy through those agencies. President Obama has a pretty good track record of this.

  

  Eliot Spitzer
  • People
  • Good
  • Power

• According to some reports coming out of Washington today, President Obama said Kanye West is a 'jackass.' Not since 'yes, we can' has Obama found a slogan so many Americans can get behind.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Today
  • Washington
  • Reports

• President Obama is doing the right thing by offering young immigrants, most often in this country through no action of their own, a chance to live and work openly, free from the fear of deportation.

  

  Eliot Spitzer
  • Work
  • Live
  • Country

• Yesterday was the New York City Marathon. The marathon was won in record time by a Democrat candidate running away from President Obama.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Time
  • Running
  • City

• President Obama is traveling around the country, proposing a stimulus bill that has already failed once. Instead of having an honest discussion about whether or not a plan that already failed once will fail again, the establishment would rather distract the American people with gossip.

  

  Alveda King
  • People
  • Country
  • American

• Regarding President Obama. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I talked to him. I sorta, I guess, helped him get elected.

  

  Ralph Stanley
  • Helped
  • President Obama
  • Elected

• Tomorrow night President Obama will announce his new immigration plan. Obama's favorite part of his new immigration plan is that he gets to emigrate to another country. He's tired of all this.

  

  Conan O'Brien
  • Country
  • Night
  • Tired

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