Chelsea Handler Quotes
I definitely don't want to have kids. I don't think I'd be a great mother. I don't want to have a kid and have it raised by a nanny. I don't have the time to raise a child.

Quotes to Explore
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I want to do roles that take women a step farther. I don't want to be slotted into anything. But if I get a brilliant role which requires me to be a mother, then I will do it. But I want people to see that a woman could be anything at whatever age, even if she is married or has two kids.
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Sometimes I like to watch TV, though I never get to watch any of the shows in real time. I'm a fan of 'Downton Abbey,' 'Boardwalk Empire,' and 'Boss.' There's a British series called 'Luther,' but in England, they think a series means four episodes. And I like 'Mad Men.' Otherwise, it's always good to unwind with a book.
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I don't really love to perform in music. Some people like it more, but it's not my thing so much, but just the writing, when you get the lyric, and the lyric just goes just the right way, or you find the right bridge that takes you to the solo, and those moments are tremendous, and it's difficult to portray.
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I am a massive fan of early electronica like Steve Reich, Pat Metheny and Thomas Dolby. I used to be a big raver, too, so anything dance. I love ambient music like Tunng. I love acoustic and classical, too.
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I've always liked working really hard and then doing nothing in particular. So, consequently, I didn't overexpose myself; I guess I maintained a kind of mystery. I wasn't ambitious.
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In a lot of ways, I wasn't a normal teenager.
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I have, like, two and a half years of failed jokes that I know I wouldn't repeat, but I certainly have no comprehension of what definitely works. And the only gauge that I can go by is, 'This makes me laugh,' and is joyful... I like to, if possible, do things that people can enjoy and it doesn't take anybody down.
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There can be no literary equivalent to truth.
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I am going to put money into education at the expense of other programs.
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I believe the Thai people are patient, and the people at least give me a chance to prove my ability to help them.
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We are all in this together. We will all make it or none of us will make it. If everyone cleans up their act except one big ole country, it isn't going to work.
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Children don't really understand the concept of health. You can't give them an apple and say 'if you eat this you will be healthy when you're older' because they don't understand. You have to find a different way to motivate them.
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People have given me the freedom and believe in me enough to say if I want to do these things that I will find a way to make it work. I don't know if they think I'm crazy, drug damaged or just an old weirdo.
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The haunting of history is ever present in Barcelona. I see cities as organisms, as living creatures. To me, Madrid is a man and Barcelona is a woman. And it's a woman who's extremely vain.
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Music Box has proven itself in a few short years to be a cutting edge distributor with a sophisticated understanding of both the market and cinema.
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All animals, except man, know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it.
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Intimate scenes on a movie set are just dry, bizarre things; people standing around.
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Twitter means all my friends are in my computer. All my ideas are in my computer. I can do whatever I want in there; I'm kind of... bionic.
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Writing is a little athletic for me. I get worked up a little bit when I do it. So I guess I'm a little bit like that composer conducting. There are a lot of things that go into what I do, but I think athletics really sort of shaped my ethic.
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They atheists want to control school curricula so they can promote a secular ideology and undermine Christianity.
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I always used to say hybrids would rule the world - people who have an understanding of many cultures and can relate to them with ease. And then along came Obama.
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My first love was the sound of guitar.
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Volleyball anchored me at a time in my life when I needed it. It gave me a reason for being this big, big girl.
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I definitely don't want to have kids. I don't think I'd be a great mother. I don't want to have a kid and have it raised by a nanny. I don't have the time to raise a child.