Chris Morris Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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I propose a Constitutional Amendment providing that, if any public official, elected or appointed, at any level of government, is caught lying to any member of the public for any reason, the punishment shall be death by public hanging.
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The first show I worked on was 'In Living Color.' I think 'The Daily Show' was the culmination of having that point of view - being able to look at this third rail in our society.
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Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century.
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Most people who went about saying a ghost had poked them with a brolly would be locked up somewhere.
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The seminaries must be like the churches' poor relations, prolonging their existence with austerity.
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Job's forthright indictment of the injustice of this world is surely right. The ways of the world are weird and much more unpredictable than either scientists or theologians generally make things look.
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I've been approached after shows from people who said, 'I don't agree with anything you said, but I laughed the whole way through.' That's still a little strange to me. Like, nothing, really? But at the same time, that's what happens in a conversation.
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The logs of wood which move down the river together Are driven apart by every wave. Such inevitable parting Should not be the cause of misery.
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I have no personal experience in the military. All I know about it is what I've seen in movies and read in books and watched on television. My knowledge is probably no more or no less than the average person's. 'A Brief Encounter with the Enemy' was created by taking bits and pieces from here and there, and then putting my own spin on them.
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The worst thing that we could do is raises taxes. It would only hurt the economy.
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These are just the tip of the iceberg, because I read and read and read. I read everything.
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Well, one thing, you got to stand in a courtroom and listen to a judge sentencing you to 25 years in prison before you realize that freedom of expression can no longer be taken for granted.
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I need wrong to get laughs. I need a normal world so that I can be abnormal, and that's my problem. Comedians need prejudice.
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I've always prided myself on my discipline as a writer. I do it like a job. I get up in the morning and go to my desk.
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It was such a pleasure to work with Eugene Levy. What a treat. That's a guy I grew up watching as a kid. Guys like that, they were hilarious and didn't have to be super vile or X-rated.
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Down to the Puritan marrow of my bones There’s something in this richness that I hate. I love the look, austere, immaculate, Of landscapes drawn in pearly monotones. There’s something in my very blood that owns Bare hills, cold silver on a sky of slate, A thread of water, churned to milky spate Streaming through slanted pastures fenced with stones.
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Darwinism is still very much alive, utterly dominating biology. Despite the fact that no one has ever been able to prove the creation of a single distinct species by Darwinist means, Darwinism dominates the academy and the media.
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When I was coming up, trying to get to where I am now, people were so happy for me. They were rooting for me. Now that I'm on top, everyone wants to bring me down. Everyone's trying to tug at me and take my spot... A lot of people say they hate Justin Bieber who haven't even listened to my music. They just hate the idea of me.
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I don't want to give you the idea that existence without your camouflage patterns is bland and innocuous because this is not the case. The inner senses have a strong immediacy, a delicious intensity that your outer senses lack. There is no lapse of time in perception, since there is no time.
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It's cool when your husband starts to sing some old Merle Haggard song and I can pop in with a harmony and it doesn't sound too bad.
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Life is all about balance, and there are certain times of the year - birthday, anniversary, holidays - that are meant to be enjoyed without guilt. That being said, Thanksgiving is a meal - it's not a Thanksgiving day, and it's not a Thanksgiving week.
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Every kind of peaceful cooperation among men is primarily based on mutual trust and only secondarily on institutions such as courts of justice and police.
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I may have punched walls when no one else was around.
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A sitcom isn't usually the right tool for satire.
