Bill Engvall Quotes
You could take Vicodin, step out of the house, onto a freeway, have a truck hit you, and you'd say 'My bad!'.

Quotes to Explore
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You don't have to be an heiress to look like one, if you act like one then everyone will just presume you are one.
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The want of money is the root of all evil.
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We did a remake of Lost in Space. Filmed it in London for four months.
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The part an actor played on stage was once written on a separate roll of paper.
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I loved the glamour and excitement of the games and, in particular, knowing the names of each and every one of the referees - that's because my mom, a former basketball player, would yell at them from our front-row seats for making bad calls!
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The 'Room 93' EP was just kind of picking apart the sense of voyeurism and the sense of isolation and turning it into, essentially, a little black book and reflecting on - at that time - 19 years of me forming relationships with people.
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When I write and develop things myself, I might work for a while on a script from a book, and then I go back and read the book and go back into it to see if I lost something: is there something there?
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I wasn't a ladies' man.
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All too often, the pitchmen are selling the notion that if you gain 'control' over your financial destiny - pick your own stocks and execute your own trades - it will be the first step on a short road to riches.
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There might be 1 finger on the trigger, but there will be 15 fingers on the safety catch.
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I am not a Ph.D. in economics or a doctorate in literature that I can afford to take my singing lightly. Even if I sing a jingle, I take it as seriously as oxygen.
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I hate to travel. I don't go anywhere.
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We had a kid. The kid was awesome. She didn't fall asleep easily. We complained about it. We got frustrated. But we didn't look for an out. We just accepted that this was part of parenting.
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Democracies can't handle austerity measures very well.
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To make theater out of real life, you need to catch dialogue when it happens.
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I think people hear the warmth in my voice and the friendliness, and they think: 'Oh, she must be a very nice person'.
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You can cage the singer but not the song.
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I'm literally open to any medium that will have me.
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Our society finds truth too strong a medicine to digest undiluted. In its purest form, truth is not a polite tap on the shoulder. It is a howling reproach.
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I've had letters from people who have read my articles and said, 'I'm a guy, I'm 18, and I've not come out to my mom and dad yet, but it was so nice to hear your story, and you know, I wish your article would have been longer, because you gave me hope for the future.'
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I had a messy signature as a child, and my grandmother said this suggested I had no regard for other people. She was right.
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I never look at my watch when I'm sketching!
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You could take Vicodin, step out of the house, onto a freeway, have a truck hit you, and you'd say 'My bad!'.