Ellen DeGeneres Quotes
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I hate having to do small talk. I'd rather talk about deep subjects. I'd rather talk about meditation, or the world, or the trees or animals, than small, inane, you know, banter.
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My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is.
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My father was a first reader in the Christian Science Church, which is similar to being a preacher. There was no drinking, smoking or cursing.
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But seriously, I think overall in the scheme of things winning an Emmy is not important. Let's get our priorities straight. I think we all know what's really important in life - winning an Oscar.
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Don't you hate when people are late to work. And they always have the worst excuses. 'Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic.' 'Traffic, huh? How do you think I got here; helicoptered in!?'
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I just like observing people - it's something I've done ever since I was a kid, and I got really good at it. That's a big part of why I became a comedian. My audience is filled with every kind of person you can imagine, and I love that.
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Find out who you are and be that person. That's what your soul was put on this Earth to be. Find that truth, live that truth and everything else will come.
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I think they should have a Barbie with a buzz cut.
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I'm probably the most honest person you'll ever meet - to a fault, like, I-will-hurt-your-feelings honest. I'm sure if I lied about anything, it would have been silly, but I haven't retained that information.
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I think everybody should have the same anger towards the injustice that's happening and the hatred that's happening, and just fight it with love and compassion.
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I am a really sensitive person.
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I learned compassion from being discriminated against. Everything bad that's ever happened to me has taught me compassion.
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Sometimes when I am driving I get so angry at inconsiderate drivers that I want to scream at them. But then I remember how insignificant that is, and I thank God that I have a car and my health and gas. That was phrased wrong - normally you wouldn't say, thank God I have gas.
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I never buy a house thinking that I'm going to sell it.
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While I was doing stand-up, I thought I knew for sure that success meant getting everyone to like me. So I became whoever I thought people wanted me to be. I'd say yes when I wanted to say no, and I even wore a few dresses.
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I didn't see deep emotion from my parents. It was all very polite and very surface. I never knew how anybody was feeling.
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I became vegan because I saw footage of what really goes on in the slaughterhouses and on the dairy farms.
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The first time probably people really were aware of me, I unfortunately had the title of Showtime's Funniest Person in America. And that's a really tough title to travel around with when you're not even known.
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Yeah I'm thirty-six, but on the show I'm thirty-two. Nobody wants to watch a thirty-six year old woman, so they decided to make me thirty-two. Much more appealing somehow.
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I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tablecloth at dinner parties. It was very blousy.
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There would be nothing to get me to run for president. I don't even understand how anyone would want that job at all. Although I would be able to play golf which I don't seem to have time now.
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A kid should be told that you can have feelings.
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I've moved about 10 times over the past 15 years. I don't move for the sole purpose of getting rid of stuff. I'm not crazy. I also move so that I never have to wash any windows.
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For a long time I thought I knew for sure who I was. I grew up in New Orleans and became a comedian. And there was everything that came along with that. The nightclubs. The smoking. The drinking. Then I turned 13.