Mallory Ortberg Quotes
My history teacher could make us feel like he was imparting rare gossip to us when he was talking about Maria Theresa and the Habsburgs. I just loved that sense of - the Western canon is here, and it's gossipy and tawdry, and everyone is sort of goofy.
Quotes to Explore
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You really are being quite foolish to smoke.
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My whole life, people have been saying, Why are you so angry?
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I think shoppers are looking for newness and creativity. Look at C. Wonder, for instance. They're dancing in our stores. We don't believe in retail like retail was done in the past. We believe in disrupting the whole environment, offering them amazing value in an amazing package of fun, excitement and whimsy.
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My father, I think he played percussion in high school. My mother played piano when she was very young, but only for a brief while. I don't think she had a great teacher. In any case, neither of them were really into music at a young age.
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For the first time I go to La Scala, for each thing, for each rehearsal, my knees were shaking. But the audience was very fine with me.
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An efficient government is dangerous in the hands of the wrong man. Sadly, the right sort of man never seems interested in the job.
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I always wanted to be an actress. And it wasn't ego. I felt so little about myself, considered myself such a sparrow. Not just my size. I thought I was so plain... I did plays not to show off but because if I did that - I didn't realize it at the time - I would be somebody other than this person I didn't really approve of.
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I live for my work, apart from my family who come first. And I live to tell stories and pretend to be other people, it's something I've been doing since I was 3 years old. Maybe it's because I'm intrinsically bored with myself, and I find other people more interesting.
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I think the Catholic faith is consistent with the kind of conservatism I believe in.
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Any well-read man knows that the moral difference between the condition of the world before Christianity was planted and since Christianity took root is the difference between night and day, the kingdom of heaven and the kingdom of the devil.
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It is so important for girls and boys to have a female, strong superhero to look up to.
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There are a lot of dynamics and a lot of politics that go into records and getting played on the radio.
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Cicero, in his treatise concerning the Nature of the Gods, having said that three Jupiters were enumerated by theologians, adds that the third was of Crete, the son of Saturn, and that his tomb is shown in that island.
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So even though I consider myself a fairly upbeat person, energetic and things like that, I never do very well on happiness tests.
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Once humans traded their hunter-gatherer existences for more settled communities, we began a quest to make our lives better and more comfortable, but we've also been sucking precious finite resources from our environment ever since.
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I'm a big believer in exercise. I'm a bigger believer in eating right, which is simply with plenty of fruits and vegetables. I'm not a gym girl, though. I've never had a gym membership.
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I meet everybody. If somebody invites me to their house and they got a drum set close, I'm going to play, man. Let's jam. I don't care. Get in where you fit in and enjoy the experience.
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Jobs has within him sort of this conflict, but he doesn't quite see it as a conflict between being hippie-ish and anti-materialistic but wanting to sell things like Wozniak's board. Wanting to create a business.
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I grew up in an era of pretty severe poverty. My parents weathered the Great Depression, and money was always a very big concern. I was weaned on a shortage mentality and placed in foster homes largely because there simply wasn't enough money to take care of the most basic of needs.
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Kindness eases everything almost as much as money does.
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I had a history for starting something and maybe getting halfway done. Then I'd see the same thing I was doing on the bestseller list! My ideas were right, but I hadn't done them fast enough.
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It's hard for me to even watch comedies I'm in.
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I was a wedding planner's assistant for years. And I knew I did not want to have a traditional wedding because I had worked a million of them. So my husband and I got married at a sleepaway camp in the Berkshires.
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My history teacher could make us feel like he was imparting rare gossip to us when he was talking about Maria Theresa and the Habsburgs. I just loved that sense of - the Western canon is here, and it's gossipy and tawdry, and everyone is sort of goofy.
