Jeff Dunham Quotes

Math? Forget about it. If I add four plus eight plus six, I have to count on my fingers. I guess I'm hooked up differently.

Jeff Dunham

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Quotes to Explore

• A few weeks after my mom passed in November of 2013, I came back from an injury and entered the Egg Bowl in the second half against Ole Miss. I'll never forget the feeling when I walked back out on the field. As I walked into the Egg Bowl, the crowd stood up and clapped like they were enveloping me in a giant hug.

  

  Dak Prescott
  • Up
  • Feeling
  • Mom

• On the Left, the best and brightest go into politics - Barack Obama is the epitome of the perfect leftist. On the Right, the best and brightest go make money. Very few conservatives want to endure all the nonsense you have to put up with to run for office.

  

  Ted Cruz
  • Up
  • Money
  • Perfect

• Being on TV sucks. It's a lot of work. You memorize scripts and then you show up and they change everything. I'm a control freak. When I'm doing stand-up, I say what I want and then I get instant feedback.

  

  Gabriel Iglesias
  • Up
  • Work
  • Change

• On one hand, we know that everything happens for a reason, and there are no mistakes or coincidences. On the other hand, we learn that we can never give up, knowing that with the right tools and energy, we can reverse any decree or karma. So, which is it? Let the Light decide, or never give up? The answer is: both.

  

  Yehuda Berg
  • Up
  • Energy
  • Light

• When an accident or a crime happens, there's a period of time before the yellow tape goes up, before the official response becomes formalized. That allows the nightcrawlers to get very close.

  

  Dan Gilroy Breakfast Club
  • Up
  • Time
  • Period

• What happens to a dream deferred? Does it dry up Like a raisin in the sun? Or does it explode?

  

  Langston Hughes
  • Up
  • Dream
  • Like

• Growth should take care of the fear of job losses. People will be challenged to do different things. For people who are not up to it, purely based on objective assessment, that's a different issue, which, you do it anyway.

  

  Uday Kotak
  • People
  • Up
  • Different

• Thank God we're not like America. Everyone wants to look like they're 20. In Europe we admire grown-up women; I think men revere older women.

  

  Francesca Annis
  • Up
  • God
  • Men

• Award shows, like the Grammys, were tough on us early in hip-hop, not even televising our categories or splitting them up on best male or female or any of that. We had to earn them.

  

  Queen Latifah
  • Up
  • Best
  • Tough

• Sometimes, in order to follow our moral compass and/or our hearts, we have to make unpopular decisions or stand up for what we believe in.

  

  Tabatha Coffey
  • Up
  • Believe
  • Moral

• I was brought up to think a lot about food and have respect for it, both as medicine and something to eat and enjoy.

  

  Tamsin Egerton
  • Up
  • Food
  • Respect

• Here's the miracle: I grew up thinking, 'Wouldn't it be great to write 'Superman' someday? Wouldn't it be great to create my own show, or work on 'Lensman,' or 'Forbidden Planet?' Those were very literally the goals I set for myself, the dreams that I thought I didn't have a chance in hell of ever actually achieving. But it's happened.

  

  J. Michael Straczynski
  • Up
  • Work
  • Great

• I don't feel like I have to dress up to go to the deli.

  

  Adam Driver
  • Up
  • Like
  • Feel

• There are two types of courage involved with what I did. When it comes to picking up a rifle, millions of people are capable of doing that, as we see in Iraq or Vietnam. But when it comes to risking their careers, or risking being invited to lunch by the establishment, it turns out that's remarkably rare.

  

  Daniel Ellsberg
  • People
  • Up
  • Courage

• My kids have a competitive drive I never had growing up.

  

  Damon Wayans
  • Up
  • Kids
  • Growing

• In the house in Beverly Hills where our four children grew up, living conditions were a few thousand times improved over the old tenement on New York's East 93rd Street we Marx Brothers called home.

  

  Harpo Marx
  • Up
  • Children
  • Home

• I don't think, until you've actually lost somebody you really love, that you can go through that door that allows you to be grown-up.

  

  Felicity Kendal
  • Up
  • Love
  • Think

• You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going.

  

  P. J. O'Rourke
  • Up
  • Children
  • Growing

• I remember driving the tractor on our farm, and Tim McGraw would be on the radio. I'd find myself walking out of class, singing his songs. And then Tim ended up playing my father in 'Friday Night Lights.' It was surreal.

  

  Garrett Hedlund
  • Up
  • Remember
  • Father

• Being up on something is a way of dismissing it. To espouse any point of view is a danger - it might leave us stuck with last year's cause. Prized for their novelty alone, ideas, gimmicks, trends become equivalent, interchangeable.

  

  Edmund White
  • Up
  • Alone

• For me, the winning strategy in any start-up business is, 'Think big but start small.'

  

  Carmen Busquets
  • Up
  • Business
  • Small

• I've spent a part of my life focused on acting, so if there was an opportunity that I'm right for and I feel confident, I would definitely go for it.

  

  Jessie Pavelka
  • Life
  • Opportunity

• The abstract analysis of the world by mathematics and physics rests on the concepts of space and time.

  

  James J. Gibson
  • Time
  • World
  • Space

• Math? Forget about it. If I add four plus eight plus six, I have to count on my fingers. I guess I'm hooked up differently.

  

  Jeff Dunham
  • Up
  • Math