Jeff Garlin Quotes

I don't think I'm ever going to retire from stand-up, but what I have retired from is working the road every week.

Jeff Garlin

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Quotes to Explore

• Sometimes when I'm going to the supermarket to get the coffee and cat litter, I get freaked out and see all these people staring, and you turn around and there's, like, 40 people all looking at you... and when you go around the corner, they're all following you! You start freaking out like a trapped animal.

  

  Kate Bush
  • People
  • Animal
  • Coffee

• What novels do that biographies don't is get at truths by penetrating the facts, by going deeper to what's underneath fact, through invention.

  

  Varley O'Connor
  • Facts
  • Fact
  • Deeper

• In a family of all girls, I was always the 'boy' in my mind - the protector, the masculine one. No one would ever have to worry about me.

  

  Kate Christensen
  • Mind
  • Family
  • Worry

• Being American and being an outsider at the same time, it's a perspective I often bring to a character.

  

  Aasif Mandvi
  • Time
  • Character
  • American

• I never thought I'd be in a position where people would be talking about my sexuality and saying how good I look in underwear.

  

  Fiona Apple
  • People
  • Good
  • Thought

• Poverty is an anomaly to rich people; it is very difficult to make out why people who want dinner do not ring the bell.

  

  Walter Bagehot
  • People
  • Why
  • Poverty

• The men and women of my generation are heirs to that great collective success which has been admired worldwide and of which we are so proud. It is now up to us to pass it on to the coming generations.

  

  Felipe VI of Spain
  • Up
  • Great
  • Men

• There are so many figures in our history that did not believe they could make a change, and they did.

  

  Malala Yousafzai
  • Believe
  • History
  • Change

• Politics is largely a matter of heart.

  

  R. A. Butler
  • Heart
  • Politics
  • Matter

• It's become a habit to make films where the father is absent. My father impresses me, but the father figure does not.

  

  Xavier Dolan
  • Father
  • Me
  • Habit

• You should always leave the party 10 minutes before you actually do.

  

  Gary Larson
  • Party
  • Always
  • Leave

• I love Dr. Hauschka's blue mascara. It's not so blue that it's like, 'What's wrong with you?' It's more like a secret that you're wearing it.

  

  Lake Bell
  • Like
  • Secret
  • Wrong

• The 'chinked out' style is a school of hip hop - that's the way I like to think of it - that incorporates Chinese elements and sounds.

  

  Wang Leehom
  • School
  • Think
  • Style

• The fact is, it's hard to release movies.

  

  Campbell Scott
  • Movies
  • Hard
  • Fact

• I'm constantly trying to work on the person that I am and work on my shortcomings, and I guess I want people to know that it's ok to be a work in progress, as long as you keep trying to figure it out. But that search and that discovery is what makes life kind of rich, and it's what makes life rich... period.

  

  Idina Menzel
  • People
  • Life
  • Work

• I don't prepare myself for a specific fighter. I don't choose a fight to prepare myself for another fighter.

  

  Canelo Alvarez
  • Myself
  • Fight
  • Prepare

• Mike Tyson was one of the fighters who motivated me. How? We both used to train at the Golden Gloves boxing gym. I used to see his Rolls-Royce, his diamond Rolex on, and I said, 'You know what? Those are the things that I want.'

  

  Floyd Mayweather, Jr.
  • Want
  • Train
  • Diamond

• I'm one of those fellows so frightened of driving that I go 80 miles an hour - and the more frightened I get, the faster I go.

  

  Orson Welles
  • Driving
  • More
  • Go

• I speak for a lot of church groups, youth groups, schools, colleges and do personal appearances. I've done conventions and trade shows. A lot of different little hats.

  

  Donna Douglas
  • Different
  • Done
  • Church

• My baby ohhhCome take control, just grab a holdOf my body and mind; soon we'll be making itHoney, oh we're feeling fineYou're my medicine. Open up and let me in.Darling, you're so great;I can't wait for you to operate.

  

  Marvin Gaye
  • Up
  • Great
  • Mind

• Whenever you talk about Chinese dragons, emperors, palaces, concubines - they conjure up a whole colonial argle-bargle that has nothing to do with historical reality.

  

  Ken Liu
  • Up
  • Reality
  • Chinese

• I handle screenings and award ceremonies really badly.

  

  Damien Chazelle
  • Really
  • Handle
  • Award

• I grew up being absolutely in love with Tom Hanks. I remember, all the kids had Brad Pitt plastered all over their textbooks, and then I had Tom Hanks plastered over mine.

  

  Yvonne Strahovski
  • Kids
  • Remember
  • Textbooks

• I don't think I'm ever going to retire from stand-up, but what I have retired from is working the road every week.

  

  Jeff Garlin
  • Up
  • Road