Jim Gaffigan Quotes
When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me - I'm 43, balding, blond, whatever - there's something absolutely invigorating about winning them over. Even if it's eight people from Sweden who don't understand what I'm talking about.
Quotes to Explore
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I don't eat animals. I rescue strays and take injured pigeons to the wildlife rehab. I carry spiders and wasps outside in a cup covered with a 3x5 card. It would only follow that I'd take pause when contemplating the abrupt and apparently brutal ending of a tiny human being's life, or even a potential human being's life.
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I refuse to accept other people's ideas of happiness for me. As if there's a 'one size fits all' standard for happiness.
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Any constitutional amendment that simply gives Congress the option of regulating campaign finance fails to immediately achieve what the American people want, and that is a complete reversal of Citizens United and other Supreme Court decisions that have allowed corporations and the wealthy few to drown out the voices of everyday voters.
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I actually have a fear of the water because I nearly drowned. I got caught in a rip tide, and I wasn't a good swimmer because that was when I was emigrating from England to Australia.
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Soldiers are not policemen, and it's very unfair, even for those soldiers who have some police training, to burden them with police duties. It's not what they're trained for, or equipped for.
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It is the easiest thing in the world to die. The hardest is to live.
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I have now exactly the same weight I had when I was 18, 20.
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Bipartisanship is really tough to achieve when everyone on both sides is left with a bad, bad taste in their mouths.
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I've got no respect for any young man who won't join the colors.
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The more I push myself to really live and really experience things and step outside of my comfort zone, the more the songs are allowed to flow.
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Tennis is definitely a star for women in sports.
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The falsification of scientific data or analysis is always a serious matter.
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If you're going to take a jab at someone, you should at least have a bit more of a personal relationship with them. I feel like you can be funny and clever, as opposed to just outright vile.
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I did model for a little while part-time, but I wasn't a bloody model, and I am definitely not that horrible thing 'model-turned-actress.'
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My mom and my dad were married 56 years, and the fact that I reconciled with my dad I think made their marriage a little bit better as well.
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My hand is the extension of the thinking process - the creative process.
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I had a teacher at school who said, 'We are going to do a play next year, and you're in it.' He said, 'You should try out for the Royal Academy as an actor.' I did and got in. I was 17. My mum wasn't too happy, but it worked out OK.
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My mom and I are very close.
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Knowing there is a capable back-up willing to give it a try always makes you feel better.
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My childhood was appalling.
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The old ideals are dead as nails--nothing there. It seems to me there remains only this perfect union with a woman--sort of ultimate marriage--and there isn't anything else.
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I love to get a massage but I'm quite a baby with it. I don't like them too hard or anyone walking on me or anything. When it's good, it's the best thing ever. When it's bad, it's an hour of absolute agony.
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I believe in Christianity because the Scriptures said: "The things that have been done in the dark will be known on the house tops."
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When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me - I'm 43, balding, blond, whatever - there's something absolutely invigorating about winning them over. Even if it's eight people from Sweden who don't understand what I'm talking about.
