Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Award shows are really silly. I'm very happy for the people that win the awards, and I can say they're really silly, but I would love to get one. So I also know wasting time on that is pointless.
Quotes to Explore
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Whenever I'm waiting behind the stage, it's kind of like my normal Jackie mode is me talking a lot, playing around, but superstar Jackie mode is me concentrating on making sure that this performance was going to be a great performance.
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Politics is the enemy of the imagination.
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Advertising is what you do when you can't go see somebody. That's all it is.
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Judge of your natural character by what you do in your dreams.
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I said if I have a No. 1, I'll do a naked photo shoot! I'm not sure a lot of people would like to see that, but it was more to the fans, really. Every gig I do, they try to get me to take my clothes off, so it's a promise to them - if I get a No. 1, I'll happily do a naked shoot.
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When I was prepping for my Broadway debut as Romeo, it really hit me that I had never done that. I had trained at drama school for three years in my late teens to early 20s, and I'd studied Shakespeare, of course, but I hadn't actually performed it. So to do something like Romeo for my first Broadway role was a challenge.
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The names are bigger, the show is worldwide, but I get a royal pass into life in the broadcasting business.
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I'm from Port Arthur, Texas! Little guy! Little character guy from one of the saddest oil-refinery towns in America. And here I was driving over to Beverly Hills, to 20th Century Fox, to be on 'M*A*S*H!'
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Usually people are questioning my athleticism more than my femininity!
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I feel there's enough seriousness in the world without seeing it in the theatre.
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When you see results, you start to wonder, 'What would happen if I had oatmeal instead of sausage for breakfast?' You start to eat better because you feel better.
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Bipartisanship is really tough to achieve when everyone on both sides is left with a bad, bad taste in their mouths.
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If you grew up in my generation, you're going to be influenced by Run DMC, the Beastie Boys and also listen to Metallica - it wasn't segregated anymore.
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I was raised in Chicago and I guess that was one of the special breeding grounds for gangsters of all colors. That was the Detroit of the gangster world. The car industry was thugs.
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I'll tell you something: my dad was a nuclear engineer and he was really bright, and I've always said that because of negotiating at such a young age with my dad, it was really such a gift because I could then negotiate with very difficult personalities - and not end up being the scapegoat. I learned to really pick and choose my battles.
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Men are sort of doofuses about sunscreen, and for the most part, women are more inclined to take better care of themselves, but a reminder is always good for everyone.
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For some reason, I just lack that ability to be embarrassed about going up to people. I even do it for friends if they want to ask someone out.
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I'm fortunate to be famous for two rather imposing characters like Magneto and Gandalf.
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Madonna is a creation, so perhaps we should give her and the factory that created her a little credit, but I think that she should quietly disappear now. Poor Madge seems unable to decide whether she wants to look like Marilyn Monroe or Marlene Dietrich.
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The Paris peace talks kept a roof over my head and food on the table and clothes on my back because if something was said going in or coming out, I had the rent for the month.
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Men are virtuous because the women are; women are virtuous from necessity.
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I have leukemia, and my chemotherapy has destroyed my immune system.
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Country people do not behave as if they think life is short; they live on the principle that it is long, and savor variations of the kind best appreciated if most days are the same.
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Award shows are really silly. I'm very happy for the people that win the awards, and I can say they're really silly, but I would love to get one. So I also know wasting time on that is pointless.
