Jim Gaffigan Quotes
Award shows are really silly. I'm very happy for the people that win the awards, and I can say they're really silly, but I would love to get one. So I also know wasting time on that is pointless.
Quotes to Explore
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Politics is the enemy of the imagination.
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Advertising is what you do when you can't go see somebody. That's all it is.
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Judge of your natural character by what you do in your dreams.
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I said if I have a No. 1, I'll do a naked photo shoot! I'm not sure a lot of people would like to see that, but it was more to the fans, really. Every gig I do, they try to get me to take my clothes off, so it's a promise to them - if I get a No. 1, I'll happily do a naked shoot.
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When I was prepping for my Broadway debut as Romeo, it really hit me that I had never done that. I had trained at drama school for three years in my late teens to early 20s, and I'd studied Shakespeare, of course, but I hadn't actually performed it. So to do something like Romeo for my first Broadway role was a challenge.
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The names are bigger, the show is worldwide, but I get a royal pass into life in the broadcasting business.
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I'm from Port Arthur, Texas! Little guy! Little character guy from one of the saddest oil-refinery towns in America. And here I was driving over to Beverly Hills, to 20th Century Fox, to be on 'M*A*S*H!'
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Usually people are questioning my athleticism more than my femininity!
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I feel there's enough seriousness in the world without seeing it in the theatre.
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When you see results, you start to wonder, 'What would happen if I had oatmeal instead of sausage for breakfast?' You start to eat better because you feel better.
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Bipartisanship is really tough to achieve when everyone on both sides is left with a bad, bad taste in their mouths.
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If you grew up in my generation, you're going to be influenced by Run DMC, the Beastie Boys and also listen to Metallica - it wasn't segregated anymore.
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I was raised in Chicago and I guess that was one of the special breeding grounds for gangsters of all colors. That was the Detroit of the gangster world. The car industry was thugs.
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I'll tell you something: my dad was a nuclear engineer and he was really bright, and I've always said that because of negotiating at such a young age with my dad, it was really such a gift because I could then negotiate with very difficult personalities - and not end up being the scapegoat. I learned to really pick and choose my battles.
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Men are sort of doofuses about sunscreen, and for the most part, women are more inclined to take better care of themselves, but a reminder is always good for everyone.
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For some reason, I just lack that ability to be embarrassed about going up to people. I even do it for friends if they want to ask someone out.
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I'm fortunate to be famous for two rather imposing characters like Magneto and Gandalf.
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Tennis is definitely a star for women in sports.
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There's all this stuff that is happening in Edinburgh now, it's a sad attempt to create an Edinburgh society, similar to a London society, a highbrow literature celebrity society.
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People evolve and it's important to not stop evolving just because you've reached 'adulthood.'
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You can pick almost any field, and there's going to be weird people.
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But in Hiroshima, some people were wiped clean away, leaving only a wristwatch or a diary page. So no matter that I have inhibitions to fill all my pockets, I keep trying, hoping that one day I'll write a poem I can be proud to let sit in a museum exhibit as the only proof I existed.
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I am able to play monsters well. I understand monsters. I understand madmen.
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Award shows are really silly. I'm very happy for the people that win the awards, and I can say they're really silly, but I would love to get one. So I also know wasting time on that is pointless.
