Jim Gaffigan Quotes
I was the youngest of the six kids, and to make my older siblings laugh, that was very important. I did a great impression of our dad that made them all laugh, so that gave me a lot of power within the family.
Quotes to Explore
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I'm not religious. I was as a child, and like lots of people, I suppose, rapidly became very disillusioned with the whole thing. I also feel that organised religion has caused far more problems than it has solved.
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We learn martial arts as helping weakness. You never fight for people to get hurt. You're always helping people.
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We do high heels, and people know us for that, but the idea of wearing a flat from day to night feels special.
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When something happens far back in the past, people often can't recall exact details. Blame depends upon point of view. There may be a villain, but reality is frustrating because it's often ambiguous.
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When you look at the roles I've done and the roles coming up, they're all strong. I guess I'm more drawn to that than that kind of submissive role females can be categorised as.
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Second place is just the first place loser.
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Take the attitude of a student, never be too big to ask questions, never know too much to learn something new.
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I want to drink champagne from ladies' shoes.
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A man's friendships are, like his will, invalidated by marriage - but they are also no less invalidated by the marriage of his friends.
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I'm happy to say that I'm a lesbian in the world. I know there are people who don't want to be called women comedians, but I think it gives a path to the fact that we live in extremely patriarchal times.
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I hate bell peppers, which is annoying because they technically have my name all over them.
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I think R. Kelly's range is so vast and broad that in order to stimulate himself creatively as an artist, he has to step so, so far outside the box, or else he feels like he's not challenging himself.
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Long Kiss Goodnight has a huge cult following. They could make another version of that movie right now and make a lot of money.
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In our world of rampant 'individualisation', relationships are mixed blessings. They vacillate between a sweet dream and a nightmare, and there is no telling when one turns into the other.
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My idea of heaven is a great big baked potato and someone to share it with.
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We must think differently, look at things in a different way. Peace requires a world of new concepts, new definitions.
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When the British became Christian, Christianity in no way altered their political organisation.
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Hungary is, in a word, in a state of WAR against the Hapsburg dynasty, a war of legitimate defence, by which alone it can ever regain independence and freedom.
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Others too would occasionally entertain and privately express such doubts; though we all had been most solemnly warned by the cruel murder of Saint Francis.
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A military childhood in the 1950s was very much informed by WWII. My brothers and I often heard stories from our dad - and from other kids - about things that had happened to their dads. We constantly played war games and, nearly every Saturday, saw a different WWII movie at the post theater.
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Rick Neuheisel was recruiting me, and he told me something, and I'll never forget it: he said you make your money in the red zone. If you're down there, that's already three points, so don't turn the ball over. I kind of took that to heart, and I'm always very careful in the red zone.
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Growing up isn't simply getting old... Growing up is when you don't believe anymore.
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I was 12 or 13, and I had seen a demo about origami at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden. My dad, my step-mom, and I were at the Japan pavilion of Epcot, and my dad was going to get me an origami book. They had these really sick origami books with an overleaf, but those packs can sometimes blow, because they give you, like, eight sheets.
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I was the youngest of the six kids, and to make my older siblings laugh, that was very important. I did a great impression of our dad that made them all laugh, so that gave me a lot of power within the family.
