Jimmy Kimmel Quotes
- All Quotes
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You don't need to exorcise your personal demons onstage.
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I'm not seen as classy enough to host the Oscars.
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I did not have any delusions of grandeur as a kid.
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That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.
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There is no way, if I was running ABC, I would have kept me on the air.
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It is kind of funny that the people who don't think Hillary Clinton is fit and healthy enough to be president are so worried that Hillary Clinton is fit and healthy enough to be president.
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I still love comic books. When you have a kid, that's an excuse to keep reading all the comic books.
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I have like fifteen televisions in my house.
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There's no debate about the greenhouse effect, just like there's no debate about gravity. If someone throws a piano off the roof, I don't care what Sarah Palin tells you, get out of the way because it's coming down on your head.
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I'm on the Internet a lot more than I watch TV and most everybody I know is, and yet if you watch most late-night talk shows, it's as if it doesn't even exist. So the Internet, it's just something I wanted to make use of in some way. I was fascinated by what appeared to be a child singing this song. It just struck me as funny.
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People's lives are boring.
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I don't really need to be dirty to be funny.
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I definitely feel pressure to keep slim. I don't want to be the guy who lost weight and gained it all back. But it's hard. Sometimes I'll gorge and gain nine pounds in a weekend somehow, and I get bummed about it.