Joe R. Lansdale Quotes

I don't plot, and I don't plan. I like to be surprised like the reader.

Joe R. Lansdale

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• A waning United States would likely be more nationalistic, more defensive about its national identity, more paranoid about its homeland security, and less willing to sacrifice resources for the sake of others' development.

  

  Zbigniew Brzezinski
  • Identity
  • Sacrifice
  • Security

• If the perpetrators of the World Trade Center plane crashes had a nuclear weapon, there's no doubt in my mind but that they would've detonated it in New York.

  

  Ted Turner
  • World
  • Mind
  • Doubt

• I try to beat back the producers and engineers so they - there's not an excess of stuff used to squeeze my voice to make it artificial. There's a person in there, and people will listen; if they hear another person speak to them, they'll listen because it's lonely out here.

  

  Iggy Pop
  • People
  • Voice
  • Lonely

• I never get tired of performing to people who want to hear me. Hell, that's my handshake to the world. I'm doing just what I've wanted to do since that day I was 15 and heard Lenny Breau play the guitar.

  

  Randy Bachman The Guess Who
  • People
  • World
  • Day

• I'm not - I'm not a person looking for money. I have no political ambitions whatsoever. I don't seek power. I don't seek any kind of praise. I have no ego to fulfill.

  

  Carl Paladino
  • Money
  • Power
  • Political

• Where was Paris Hilton a year ago? She's a fabulous character to write about.

  

  Jackie Collins
  • She
  • Character
  • Year

• Then I did one fight scene, and they said it looked good. Because I did it well enough, they've given me more.

  

  Victor Garber
  • Good
  • Fight
  • Scene

• Veterans are my life's work. From the day my buddies saved my life in Iraq, I've woken up every single day dedicated to taking care of veterans and doing my best for veterans.

  

  Tammy Duckworth
  • Life
  • Up
  • Work

• Business creates jobs; government does not. Government creates a whole slew of jobs each time a new program or scheme is implemented, but always at the expense of the taxpayer. Small businesses invest in new businesses, which results in more jobs.

  

  Ralph Norman
  • Time
  • Business
  • Small

• I start out giving characters archetypes and parameters. Once I know the basics and have a rudimentary model, it's easier to carve unique curves and edges. It's quite easy to guess how a character is going to react if you know their background, and at a certain point, you realize you understand them personally.

  

  Victoria Aveyard
  • Character
  • Giving
  • Model

• When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.

  

  Walt Disney
  • Believe
  • Way
  • You

• I think a policy of isolationism toward Cuba is misplaced and hasn't worked.

  

  Rand Paul
  • Think
  • Policy
  • Cuba

• I had rather see the portrait of a dog that I know, than all the allegorical paintings they can show me in the world.

  

  Samuel Johnson
  • World
  • Dog
  • Portrait

• If there was a god, I'd still have both nuts.

  

  Lance Armstrong
  • God

• Not much goes on in the mind of a squirrel. Huge portions of what is loosely termed 'the squirrel brain' are given over to one thought: food. The average squirrel cogitation goes something like this: I wonder what there is to eat.

  

  Kate DiCamillo
  • Mind
  • Food
  • Brain

• If computers are the wave of the future, displays are the surfboards.

  

  Ted Nelson
  • Future

• Dan Smith: I've tried (in vi) 'g/[a-z]\n[a-z]/s//_/'...but that doesn't cut it. Any ideas? (I take it that it may be a two-pass sort of solution).Larry Wall: In the first pass, install perl.

  

  Larry Wall
  • May
  • Wall

• You borrow my brain for 5 seconds, and just be like 'Dude, can't handle it, unplug this bastard', because it fires in a way that is, I don't know, maybe not from this particular terrestrial realm.

  

  Charlie Sheen
  • Brain

• There are a lot of funny people and a lot of unfunny people. Some of them are women and some of them are dudes.

  

  Lake Bell
  • People
  • Women
  • Funny

• It started at one thirty on a cold Tuesday morning in January when Martin Turner, Street performer and, in his own words, apprentice gigolo, tripped over a body in front of the West Portico of St. Paul's at Covent Garden. Martin, who was none too sober himself, at first thought the body was that of one of the many celebrants who had chosen the Piazza as a convenient outdoor toilet and dormitory. Being a seasoned Londoner, Martin gave the body the "London once-over" - a quick glance to determine whether this was a drunk, a crazy or a human being in distress. The fact that it was entirely possible for someone to be all three simultaneously is why good-Samaritanism in London is considered an extreme sport - like BASE jumping or crocodile wrestling. Martin, noting the good quality coat and shoes, had just pegged the body as a drunk when he noticed that it was in fact missing its head.

  

  Ben Aaronovitch
  • Missing
  • Head
  • Wrestling

• I don't plot, and I don't plan. I like to be surprised like the reader.

  

  Joe R. Lansdale