Joe Bob Briggs Quotes
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Discourse is fleeting, but junk mail is forever.
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The man is ugly, the man is evil, and the man is in love. This is gonna be an American classic.
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The best ally you can have in breaking up a street fight is a grandmother.
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I AM a male chauvinist. Who's been saying otherwise?
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Menahem Golan, the Israeli king of the ninja flick, announced he was producing the remake.
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Joe Bob says check it out.
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In other words, New York has gone all suburban and bourgeois on us.
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In some European theaters, it's still not uncommon to have a late start and three LONG intermissions, because people actually eat and drink and converse during the intermissions.
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The fifties were when people started coming down on 'juvenile delinquents,' 'hoodlums,' 'vandals'-anybody that was young, wore a motorcycle jacket, and didn't act polite around older people.
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Almost every venerable tradition at a men's club starts out as a joke.
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Everything changed in Bosnia, when General Wesley Clark proved that you could fight a war with high- level precision air strikes and a bare minimum of ground action.
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If you hate what you're seeing, you call it sex and violence. If you like it, you call it 'romance and adventure.'
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Faith is like a kernel of wheat.
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Apparently we love our own cell phones but we hate everyone else's.
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There is no post-9/11. Everything from now until the end of time is post-9/11.
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It's not a crime to get drunk.
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The Italians always made good wine, but you had the impression they were friendly guys in straw hats running family vineyards with slaves or something so that the vino was never more than ten bucks a bottle.
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A universal draft is most often the instrument of Third World dictators.
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As I've said many times, the single most oppressed class in America right now is the teenager.
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Eleven dead bodies. One dead cat. No breasts.
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If you know what I mean, and I think you do.
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I made the mistake of watching 'A.I.' on cable the week they showed it about 792 times, and I ended up watching it every time it was on.
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Speaking of things that'll make your head explode, 'Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story' finally made it to the drive-in
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'I think we should take money from everyone,' I told her, 'regardless of their ability to pay. After all, this is America.'