John Cleese Quotes
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But then acting is all about faking. We're all very good at faking things that we have no competence with.
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I think you can write very good comedy without a partner, but what I love about it, working with a partner, is that you get to places you'd never get on your own. It's like when God was designing the world and decided we couldn't have children without a partner; it was a way of mixing up the genes so you'd get a more interesting product.
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You don't have to be the Dalai Lama to tell people that life's about change.
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The really good idea is always traceable back quite a long way, often to a not very good idea which sparked off another idea that was only slightly better, which somebody else misunderstood in such a way that they then said something which was really rather interesting.
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I don't miss London much. I find it crowded, vast and difficult to get around. Cabs are incredibly expensive.
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If God did not intend for us to eat animals, then why did he make them out of meat?
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If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'
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God was treated like this powerful, erratic, rather punitive father who has to be pacified and praised. You know, flattered.
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He who laughs most, learns best.
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The Americans all love 'The Holy Grail', and the English all love 'Life Of Brian', and I'm afraid on this one, I side with the English.
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I'm always meeting new people, and my list of friends seems to change quite a bit.
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The English contribution to world cuisine - the chip.
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Most of the bad taste I've been accused of has been generic bad taste; it's been making fun of an idea as opposed to a person.
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I find it rather easy to portray a businessman. Being bland, rather cruel and incompetent comes naturally to me.
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A man will give up almost anything except his suffering.
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English television from the Fifties to the Nineties was the least bad in the world, and now it's just as bad as it is anywhere.
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I can't tell you how scary it can be walking onto a movie and suddenly joining this family, it's like going to somebody else's Christmas dinner, everyone knows everyone, and you're there and you're not quite sure what you're supposed to be doing.