George Carlin Quotes
And, of course, the funniest food: 'kumquats'. I don't even bring them home anymore. I sit there laughing and they go to waste.

Quotes to Explore
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Life consists in what a man is thinking of all day.
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Practices were tough.
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I suffer the mortification of seeing myself attacked right and left by people at home professing patriotism and love of country who never heard the whistle of a hostile bullet. I pity them and the nation dependent on such for its existence. I am thankful, however that, though such people make a great noise, the masses are not like them.
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I did every job under the sun from bartending to ushering to temping.
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I can't see how I'd learn to be a better actor from reading reviews.
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A lot of times, I played bass on songs. Gene plays guitar on some songs.
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Sometimes, I find that just the simplest, cleanest things that are intelligently performed are funniest to me.
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The TV business is soul crushing, talent destroying and human being destroying.
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It simply isn't acceptable for the likes of Google, Facebook, Amazon and others, which amass data by the terabyte, to say, 'Don't worry, your information's safe with us, as all sorts of rules protect you' - when all evidence suggests otherwise.
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So, from a very young age, my mom tells me that I wanted to be Michael J. Fox. I didn't want to be an actor. I just wanted to be Michael J. Fox for awhile. And then, I realized that he was an actor, so I pursued that.
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I never drink anything hot; I don't like hot drinks, very strange.
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The onset of mania occurs when repression is no longer able to resist the assaults of the repressed instincts.
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I like the English. They have the most rigid code of immorality in the world.
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The nearest approach I have ever seen to the symmetry of ancient sculpture was among the Arab tribes of Ethiopia. Our Saxon race can supply the athlete, but not the Apollo.
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The directories businesses still make nothing but money. They're overleveraged, they're bankrupt entities, but they still are the largest. This is all going to move online over time. Why Citysearch and Service Magic are so important to us, is because nobody has really colonized it yet completely.
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I don't do meetings.
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The troops aren't red and blue. They're not black and white. They're not male and female. They are Americans! When they put their uniforms on, they are Americans. And that's a fact.
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Our culture in India is not a culture where we grudge each other.
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When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
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I've gone to skin doctors and they'll say to you, 'We should remove this because it's pre-cancerous,' and I'll say, 'Explain pre-cancerous to me.' I'll listen for about twenty minutes and I'll say excuse me, 'Is pre-cancerous like pre-dead? So you're saying it could turn into cancer but it's not cancer?'
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Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms - to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way.
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President Obama is the most successful food stamp president in American history. I would like to be the most successful paycheck president in American history.
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I live in a very small town and now that I've closed down my studio, I'm working at home.
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And, of course, the funniest food: 'kumquats'. I don't even bring them home anymore. I sit there laughing and they go to waste.