Howard Stern Quotes

I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.

Howard Stern

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Quotes to Explore

• I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent.

  

  Edith Sitwell
  • Funny
  • Wish
  • Government

• You can always tell an actor by the bored look in their eye whenever someone else is talking.

  

  Natasha Leggero
  • Eye
  • Look
  • Actor

• Flirting is funny. And it's awkward and weird.

  

  Hannah Simone
  • Funny
  • Weird
  • Awkward

• It's funny because a lot of people that know me as a dancer, don't know that I'm a singer, and a lot of people that know I can sing don't know I can dance. And so, I feel like at some point I have to show them both and really be able to display it and showcase it, and put that out there.

  

  Naima Adedapo
  • People
  • Funny
  • Dance

• I am the ultimate California girl, which is funny, being that I'm Canadian.

  

  Pamela Anderson
  • Girl
  • Funny
  • California

• It's so funny, actors usually have a directing ambition. I've got no ambition for directing.

  

  Majandra Delfino
  • Funny
  • Ambition
  • Directing

• We adore babies because they're so cute. And, of course, we are amused by jokes because they are funny. This is all backwards. It is. And Darwin shows us why.

  

  Daniel Dennett
  • Why
  • Funny
  • Cute

• Even though 'Spider-Man' is a huge blockbuster, it really didn't feel like that. It felt like we were making this weird, funny high school movie. Like just hanging out with a group of friends.

  

  Laura Harrier
  • School
  • Friends
  • Movie

• You can't be funny for funny's sake. You try to get as outrageous situation as you can but it always has to be believable and based in real character motivations and what people would really do.

  

  Hank Azaria
  • People
  • Real
  • Character

• And remember, it's also very funny, because side by side with grief lies joy.

  

  Fran Drescher
  • Remember
  • Funny
  • Joy

• It's funny, the hardest thing to do is to make something look like it's fast, loose and improvised, and get somebody to laugh.

  

  Abel Ferrara
  • Funny
  • Look
  • Laugh

• Normally, it's one or the other - a pretty, straight woman or a more charactery woman who isn't supposed to be attractive. But women like Tina Fey are leading the charge on being both. You can be funny and attractive.

  

  Becki Newton
  • Women
  • Pretty
  • Funny

• I actually find novels that are determined to be funny at every turn quite oppressive.

  

  Ian Mcewan
  • Funny
  • Find
  • Determined

• It was Toto that made Dorothy laugh, and saved her from growing as gray as her other surroundings. Toto was not gray; he was a little black dog, with long silky hair and small black eyes that twinkled merrily on either side of his funny, wee nose.

  

  L. Frank Baum
  • Long
  • Black
  • Small

• I have seen the very bottom of life: I was so afraid I wouldn’t be funny anymore. I just knew that I would lose my zaniness and my sense of humor. But I didn’t. Recovery turned out to be a wonderful thing.

  

  Ann Richards
  • Life
  • Funny
  • Recovery

• If people want to compete for leadership of a religious group, they can compete in piety. A chilling thought. Or funny.

  

  Mary Douglas
  • People
  • Funny
  • Religious

• I went to go see 'Final Destination' which you have to be 17 and over to see and they're like 'Uh, we need to see your I.D.' Here's the really funny thing is that I actually had done my hair and makeup that day. If I don't do my hair and makeup I can understand it but I had actually made an effort to look older.

  

  Kay Panabaker
  • Done
  • Funny
  • Hair

• It's a weird thing. Rick Springfield wrote 'Jessie's Girl,' and he probably gets sick of talking about 'Jessie's Girl.' The thing is, I didn't write 'Blurred Lines.' I didn't direct the music video. I'm really happy for the success, but it is kind of a funny thing to follow me around.

  

  Emily Ratajkowski
  • Music
  • Happy
  • Success

• I had several turtles before they were in. People seemed to think they were funny. Now everyone is wearing them practically every place. I think that's real fine, but I don't agree they should go to a formal affair. Turtlenecks with dinner jackets seem ridiculous to me.

  

  Peter Graves
  • People
  • Real
  • Funny

• Justice, sir, is the great interest of man on earth. It is the ligament which holds civilized beings and civilized nations together.

  

  Daniel Webster
  • Great
  • Together
  • Earth

• Of course having a baby derails the writing process for some time. And I will be the first to say that I have essentially no social life, because there's just nothing left after being a mom, professor, and writer. I used to be big into rock climbing. No more. A lot falls by the wayside.

  

  Marie Rutkoski
  • Life
  • Time
  • Writing

• Your powers are dead or dedicated. If they are dedicated, they are alive with God and tingle with surprising power. If they are saved up, taken care of for their own ends, they are dead.

  

  E. Stanley Jones
  • Up
  • God
  • Power

• The librarian of today, and it will be true still more of the librarians of tomorrow, are not fiery dragons interposed between the people and the books. They are useful public servants, who manage libraries in the interest of the public . . . Many still think that a great reader, or a writer of books, will make an excellent librarian. This is pure fallacy.

  

  William Osler
  • People
  • Thinking
  • Book

• I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.

  

  Howard Stern
  • Funny
  • Bored
  • Boring