Howard Stern Quotes
I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.

Quotes to Explore
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I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent.
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You can always tell an actor by the bored look in their eye whenever someone else is talking.
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Flirting is funny. And it's awkward and weird.
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It's funny because a lot of people that know me as a dancer, don't know that I'm a singer, and a lot of people that know I can sing don't know I can dance. And so, I feel like at some point I have to show them both and really be able to display it and showcase it, and put that out there.
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I am the ultimate California girl, which is funny, being that I'm Canadian.
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It's so funny, actors usually have a directing ambition. I've got no ambition for directing.
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We adore babies because they're so cute. And, of course, we are amused by jokes because they are funny. This is all backwards. It is. And Darwin shows us why.
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Even though 'Spider-Man' is a huge blockbuster, it really didn't feel like that. It felt like we were making this weird, funny high school movie. Like just hanging out with a group of friends.
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You can't be funny for funny's sake. You try to get as outrageous situation as you can but it always has to be believable and based in real character motivations and what people would really do.
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And remember, it's also very funny, because side by side with grief lies joy.
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It's funny, the hardest thing to do is to make something look like it's fast, loose and improvised, and get somebody to laugh.
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Normally, it's one or the other - a pretty, straight woman or a more charactery woman who isn't supposed to be attractive. But women like Tina Fey are leading the charge on being both. You can be funny and attractive.
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I actually find novels that are determined to be funny at every turn quite oppressive.
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It was Toto that made Dorothy laugh, and saved her from growing as gray as her other surroundings. Toto was not gray; he was a little black dog, with long silky hair and small black eyes that twinkled merrily on either side of his funny, wee nose.
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I have seen the very bottom of life: I was so afraid I wouldn’t be funny anymore. I just knew that I would lose my zaniness and my sense of humor. But I didn’t. Recovery turned out to be a wonderful thing.
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If people want to compete for leadership of a religious group, they can compete in piety. A chilling thought. Or funny.
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I went to go see 'Final Destination' which you have to be 17 and over to see and they're like 'Uh, we need to see your I.D.' Here's the really funny thing is that I actually had done my hair and makeup that day. If I don't do my hair and makeup I can understand it but I had actually made an effort to look older.
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You meet folks who are funny and really smart and persistent and loving that are confronting this thing we call poverty, which is just a shorthand for this way of life that holds you underwater. And you just wonder what our country would be if we allowed these people to flourish and reach their full potential.
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Imagine having journalists in your own home and not even covering the furniture with plastic sheets first.
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So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then President Clinton lied about a relationship, and everyone was surprised! A little naive, I feel!
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My whole life and my whole career, even through my music, I tell people: let's unify; let's show more love.
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'Chels-emojis' are in the works. I use emojis heavily in life, and I think a lot of people do. There are a number that are frustratingly absent - you know how there's kind of a generic white man and a generic white woman? I just want to put a generic black man and a generic black woman.
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Each child is made in the image of God and has inherent worth.
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I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.