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I will never vote Democrat again, they are Communists.
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I'm sickened by all religions. Religion has divided people. I don't think there's any difference between the pope wearing a large hat and parading around with a smoking purse and an African painting his face white and praying to a rock.
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I think people of lesser talent will become stars.
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I think I'm probably a little too desperate to be successful.
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I'm the voice of honesty.
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It's okay for a man to commit adultery if his wife is ugly.
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And rather than hide that, I would rather put that out on the radio and let someone see the full range of emotions. If you're going to be strong on the radio, you got to let it all out, even the ugly stuff. And you can't apologize for it.
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I've actually apologized to some people I was a real jerk to, because I feel ashamed. I didn't need to be that hungry. There was something going on inside me when I was angry and feeling very threatened and not feeling good about myself.
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Well, first of all, I'm worth every penny.
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Rick Shapiro is a top comedian.
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There are things that I won't do on the radio. I mean, the next logical question is, what won't you do. I say, well, you know, you've got to find out when you're on the air.
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I'm on the air five hours, and I blurt out anything in my head. Dangerous? Maybe.
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I'm for legalizing marijuana. Why pick on those drugs? Valium is legal. You just go to a doctor and get it and overdose on it - what's the difference? Prozac, all that stuff, so why not marijuana? Who cares? It's something that grows out of the ground - why not? Go smoke a head of cabbage. I don't care what you smoke.
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When you hire me, you hire a nut who is going to work 24 hours a day for you and never, ever burn his audience.
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Here's what happens when you die--you sit in a box and get eaten by worms. I guarantee you that when you die, nothing cool happens.
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I think I could create a cult, no problem. The hard part is getting people to kill themselves.
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My show was revolutionary, ground-breaking. When I came on the scene, people were not doing a thing.
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This country (United States) has too many freedoms.
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Most of the things I do are misunderstood. Hey, after all, being misunderstood is the fate of all true geniuses, is it not?
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I will always be mad at someone. That will never go away.