Milton Berle Quotes
Quotes to Explore
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I work hard to let my wife know how much I love her. I try to do that every day.
Darius Rucker Hootie & the Blowfish -
Some of us are like the Dead Sea, always taking in but never giving out, because we are not rightly related to the Lord Jesus.
Oswald Chambers -
To my wife 'I told you I was sick'.
Lou Holtz -
My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, "Married!" and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.
Andy Rooney -
We learned sexual technique from our dog. He taught how to beg, and he taught my wife how to roll over and play dead.
Jack Roy -
My wifes cooking is so bad the flys fix our screens.
Jack Roy
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When we got married, the first thing my wife did was put everything under both names - hers and her mother's.
Jack Roy -
My wife has to be the worst cook. I've got the only dog who begs for alka-seltzer.
Jack Roy -
When we got married my wife told me I was one in a million. I found out she was right.
Jack Roy -
When I told my wife she was lousy in bed - she went out - she got a second opinion.
Jack Roy -
I asked him "Who said you could fool around with my wife" he said everybody.
Jack Roy -
My wife made me join a bridge club... I jump off next Tuesday.
Jack Roy
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My wife and I have Olympic sex. Once every four years.
Jack Roy -
Sure I smoked pot in hospital. My wife won't let me toke at home.
Jack Roy -
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter joined me.
Jack Roy -
My personal time is limited, more so than I wish. However, my wife and I have talked about the fact that there are opportunities right now that won't be there forever. For example, when the Grateful Dead offered me to tour in 2004, my first reaction was to say no, I just can't do it. Then my wife said, "Well, let's rethink this. You don't want to look back down the road and say, I could've done that, but I said no." So, we made it work.
Warren Haynes The Allman Brothers Band -
One of the best gifts my wife could ever give me was my two little boys.
Howard Dwaine Dorough The Backstreet Boys -
My wife and kids maybe beg to differ, but I am generally a good guy.
Ralph Macchio
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The United States should not under any circumstances throw away our gun until we are sure the rest of the world cannot arm against us.
Harry S Truman -
I don't need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain.
Audrey Hepburn -
I was struck by the effortless way they moved between musical styles, all the while managing to make each their own. It was instantaneous that I knew I wanted to work with them.
Steve Berlin Los Lobos -
My wife calls our waterbed the Dead Sea.
Milton Berle