Cathy Guisewite Quotes
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Wake me up when I'm a size 5.
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In 1976 I wrote a lot about women trying to claim the right to work.
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A young bride can put on makeup at 6 in the morning and look fabulous at midnight. I have about a 15-minute window where I actually look good, and then I have to wash my face and start over.
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Sometimes the best Christmas present is remembering what you've already got.
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What happened to the good old days of "Woman as passive recipient?" What happened to being courted? What happened to sitting back under a parasol and granting someone a chance to try to win us over?
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I'm more financially successful, but it just means the shopping blunders I make are bigger now.
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Small wastebasket liners, $1.17 ... tall wastebasket liners, $2.29 ... garbage can liners, $3.98 ... I think I just spent $7.44 buying something I'm going to throw away.
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Cartooning is a wonderful career, and I'd like more women to get to have it. I can't think of any reason why we won't see more syndicated female cartoonists in the future.
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I never thought Cathy would get married in the comic strip. And I also thought I would never get married.
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I can't tell my conscience from my insecurities.
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All mothers have intuition. The great ones have radar.
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The specific story line that people have responded to the most has been the horror of bathing suit shopping.
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Imagine my surprise when, after a lifetime of teaching me to keep personal things to myself, Mom insisted my drawings were the start of a comic strip for millions of people to enjoy.
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My dog was with me all the time. I talked to my dog. She was my best buddy. I shared all my secrets with her, but I don't think I every really tried jokes out with the dog.
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I was going to sip on a diet soda, but a little voice convinced me I needed the extra calcium from a cup of hot chocolate.
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There are self-awareness groups, to help you discover who you really are ... encounter groups, to help you deal with who you really are ... assertiveness training groups to help you stand up for who you really are ... Suddenly, the only way to become an individual is to join a group.
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I'm married, which means that instead of occasionally wondering about men from afar, I actually live with one and can be constantly astounded by the strange male brain.
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My heart always belongs to the one who doesn't want it.
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I'd love to see more equal representation of female and male cartoonists on the comics page.
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Men should come with instruction booklets.
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When you eat a carrot that is nothing but carrot it zooms through your system as a carrot. When you eat a piece of mass-produced carrot cake that contains 32 ingredients, your metabolism screeches to a halt while your body tries to figure out what all those things are that you just swallowed, and what it is supposed to do with them. Therefore, the problem isn’t “fat”, its piles of excess ingredients your body’s stacked on shelves and vowed to sort out later.
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Allow yourself to graduate, every five years.
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After 14 years of dieting, there are only two things I've never lost. Hope and weight.
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When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.