Pat Paulsen Quotes
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Only 10 percent of the people in the U.S. like dry wines. You shouldn't get down on people just because they like a little sugar.
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… let's all remember that we have a government 'of the people, for the people, and by the people', and there are very few people in our government that you can't buy.
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I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
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Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.
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I think I'd make a pretty good president, and they have a great pension plan.
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We have nothing to fear but fear itself... and, of course, the boogieman.
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In America, any boy can grow up to become president. Or, if he never grows up, vice president.
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I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.
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You have to understand, I can't do any jokes about Ross Perot, because the last thing I need right now is another credit check.
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I admit I do have some drawbacks and limitations as a candidate. Although I am a professional comedian, some of my critics maintain that this is not enough. I cannot deny that I stand before you untested and inexperienced - I only spent two years in television, never as a romantic lead or a song and dance man.
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I came down to Orange because I sold the Smothers Brothers a song called 'Chocolate,' and that gave me enough money to move down here. I was washing windows down in Orange County when they called me up and said they wanted me to do their TV show.
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I will not claim I will solve all the world's problems by myself. If I did, I'd have to run as a Republican or a Democrat.
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I've been on the campaign trail so long, some of my wine has turned to vinegar.
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We've got to step up our conservation efforts before it's too late. We're not protecting our lands and natural resources. Take the Grand Canyon for example; I'm sure that at one time it was a beautiful piece of land, and just look at the way we've let it go.
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The Clinton Administration has turned out to be a boon. I knew that he would be wonderful, I just knew it from the beginning. From Arkansas? Shoot.
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As I've always said: The future lies ahead.
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We must remember that as the centuries go by, time will pass.
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People come up to me in bars and on street corners and they say to me, 'Hey, Paulsen, have you got any change?'
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I like to pour my wines for people. I watch their eyes, I can see what they'll like. Most people say they don't like dry wine because they haven't had a dry wine that's clean and fruity, instead of a big, oaky thing.
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Will I obliterate national debt? Sure, why not?
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The last few years of my life have been a little like a long ride in a Poop de Ville with the bottom down.
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Wine is something to enjoy. We get sick and tired of people who pick it apart and talk about its 'saucy nuances.'
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Many political experts have told me that nobody will vote for me because America is not ready for such decisive and dynamic leadership. They tell me these things, and I say nay to the negative nincompoops who never nourished the nihilistic nerve to name a novice to nail down the nomination.
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If you're old enough to be arrested, you're old enough to carry a gun.