P. J. O'Rourke Quotes

Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.

Quotes to Explore
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I do not deal with threats and ultimatums.
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There are times I think it might be nice to have deep-pocketed limited partners to provide me with some cushion. But I enjoy having no responsibilities except to myself, financially.
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For a long time I have been thinking about affordable fashion - you can be disappointed when not so many people can wear your stuff.
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Too many African countries have already hit rock-bottom - ungoverned, poverty-stricken, and lagging further and further behind the rest of the world each day; there is nowhere further to go down.
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I don't know how to make Harper and Alloy want me, not just my name.
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For the year after I left government service, I worked as a consultant to the Republican National Committee because the lawyers advised that was the proper way for me to comply with ethics regulations and continue to advise the President.
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I know the power obedience has of making things easy which seem impossible.
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It's funny to think that when you get done with an acting job, you're considered unemployed. There are definitely times when those checks don't last forever. I went to college at a private school, and I racked up quite a bit of debt. I was very slow to pay them back.
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I respect the Indian government for the fact that there are no settlements in Kashmir.
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Each great athlete must some day bow to that perennial old champion, Father Time, even as I, for Time eventually wins.
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Women are capable of doing so many things these days, physically, emotionally, within relationships and career. There are so many things that women have evolved into and I feel really proud about where women are right now.
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It is better to entertain an idea than to take it home to live with you for the rest of your life.
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People are incredible creatures of habit.
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I'm not in this sport to say a guy can beat me.
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Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.
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Most historians and other writers of what we now consider 'primary sources' simply didn't think about women and their contribution to society. They took it for granted, except when that contribution or its lack directly affected men.
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It's my view that any conservative who loves his country has to be extremely concerned.
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Any chance to get out and play live for some people and get out of the studio is nice.
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All the things that I find beautiful have a darkness about them.
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Vegetarians are cool. All I eat are vegetarians - except for the occasional mountain lion steak.
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I would literally sit at home and have my friends take pictures of me on my little Canon camera that my mom gave me for Christmas.
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Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.
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New York has made me so paranoid, too. Whenever I visit another city, I always act like I'm from there, so the cab driver doesn't rip me off. I'm always like, "Yeah, it's good to be back home. Back here where I grew up. Yeah. Here in Tokyo. ... Uh, driver, I need to go to my old stomping grounds. That would be the Holiday Inn. And the address appears to be the pound sign."
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Don't send funny greeting cards on birthdays or at Christmas. Save them for funerals, when their cheery effect is needed.