Kevin Nealon Quotes
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My heart started running away, like a pack of horses. Then it slowed down and became irregular.
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What happened was, I always wanted to be a singer/songwriter kind of guy like a James Taylor or Crosby, Stills and Nash type of thing; I went to a lot of coffee houses and used to watch all those guys, but I never had the nerve to get up and do it because singing seems so personal and intimate to me. It was too revealing.
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It is a great rush to come up with a joke that gets a good response from the audience. It's gold!
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I grew up watching stand-ups and thought it was so entertaining and unique - you didn't see that as a job description anywhere.
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I worked for a temp agency called Manpower.
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It's kind of fun when you're playing characters that aren't quite on the up and up and people still like you.
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I play a lot of sports. I'm not real good at any of them. I'm above adequate.
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When you discover that you are going to have a child, it stirs up memories of your own childhood.
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When I would see my friends with their kids, I was envious that you can use children to get out of just about anything. If you don't feel like going to a dinner party, you could say, 'My kid's sick. I can't make it.' Who's gonna argue with you?
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I have a wandering eye and a lazy eye so they cancel each other out. It's a push.
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I learned how to draw from being bored in school. I would doodle on the margins of my paper.
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A special validates you as a stand-up by documenting your material.
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I am whelmed, and not overly whelmed, just whelmed about a lot of facets in life - just how fragile life is and the different challenges you have in life, phobias about things.
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I really like to read when I'm eating - 'The New York Times' or the 'Wall Street Journal,' paper version.
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A novel is too much of a commitment. I tend to peruse Twitter - I check to see if I had any mentions and read the latest messages.
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I just loved stand-up comics as a kid. I'd watch them on 'The Tonight Show,' and I thought what a great craft it was to come out on stage with no instrument or anything and be able to entertain people.
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I was born in St. Louis; I lived there for three weeks and then my father graduated from St. Louis University, so we all got in the car and split. I don't really remember much. I grew up in Connecticut most of my life and then four years in Germany. My father worked for a helicopter company, so we went over there.
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Workers insist that they are not disgruntled. They are very gruntled.
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My adrenaline is definitely going, but it's mostly my real, laid-back persona carrying over on stage. When I first started, I was nervous, I'd be really high energy, and I'd be sweating. Now it's just my job. It's like a machinist who goes to work every day and uses the same drill bits. He's not worried about taking his finger off.
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I've done this commercial with Arnold Palmer. He doesn't play that much anymore, but it'd be fun to have him in the cart.
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A lot of baby boomers are baby bongers.
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Any day that is designated to shower the person you love with love is my favorite holiday.
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I recently purchased an iPad 2 because I didn't want to wait for the iPad 3 and iPad 4.
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A whole generation of people that didn't know me from 'SNL' recognize me from 'Weeds' now. People recognize me once in a while and appreciate the work. It gets a little embarrassing but it's good. If you work as an accountant, you don't have people coming up to you in the streets saying, 'Hey, great job on tax statements!'