Chelsea Handler Quotes
I always thought to myself, 'I don't want to be doing stand-up when I'm 40 years old.'
Quotes to Explore
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All I came to Los Angeles with was a dream. No one from my family ever left Ohio.
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The first decent building I did with my own practice was a chapel in Taiwan.
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Through the years of experience I have found that air offers less resistance than dirt.
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Don't sell credits; don't sell walk-on roles... If people want to back you, they'll back you. But if you have to entice people will walk-on roles and crazy credits, you're undermining yourself.
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In its worse forms, conservatism is a matter of 'I hate strangers and anything that's different.'
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Human beings are a social species. We like to hang together in groups, just like wildebeests, just like lions. Wildebeests don't hang with lions because lions eat wildebeests. Human beings are like that. We do what that group does that we're trying to identify with.
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Leaving Egypt and the people I loved so much, and the environment I liked, was definitely worth it, because I also have great love for medicine and science.
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I did a lot of stunts, so the harness work isn't foreign to me either.
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On Monday mornings I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created jerks.
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Honestly, I find writing to be a very lonely job.
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I used to wear miniskirts with my GB top, and sparkly sandals, and the boys would be like: 'Oh my gosh, this girl cannot be serious.'
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If you can't play guitar and sing in Nashville, you might as well just be a construction worker.
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As anyone who has covered the company for any length of time knows, Yahoo's record on major decision-making has been akin to a hippie commune - a lot of wrangling internally in a culture where everyone seems to have a voice and a reticence to push the button to launch.
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Fairy tales opened up a door into my imagination - they don't conform to the reality that's around you as a child. I started reading when I was three and read everything, but I wanted to be an actress.
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Every Jew is my brother, and I will not succumb to hate speech.
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The first week Banks was with us, we knew he was going to be a star.
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There is no kind of music I don't listen to. Everything good is interesting. I am as happy with a Bach fugue as I am with a record by Thelonious Monk.
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With all of the qualities of the scene-setting, the dialogue, the place and time and the time and place in which your characters move. And I want to move with the characters, move with them and describe the world in which they are living.
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The 'Tim And Eric' experience was very strange.
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I have spent a lot of time in the art world, and I guess I do listen to how people speak. I'm interested in what they say and how they say it.
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My mother gave me this book called Feature Films at Used Car Prices by a guy named Rick Schmidt. I gotta credit the guy, cuz he gave me the most practical advice. It empowers you.
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I find that most novels are not good all the way through. A story can be good all the way through, every sentence.
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I've kept my phone on silent for a year and a half. For me, it's too much noise. It's not my jam. I like to keep things a lot more easygoing. The world's not going to stop if you don't pick up your phone.
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I always thought to myself, 'I don't want to be doing stand-up when I'm 40 years old.'
